TV Licensing has revealed the top excuses it’s been given this year by people who haven’t paid their TV Licence.
The number of people not paying their licence is pretty low – only around 5% aren’t coughing up – but the excuses this small number of people have given to avoid the £145.50 annual fee are pretty imaginative.
Here’s the top 12 excuses we’ve found:
* “Why would I need a TV Licence for a TV I stole? Nobody knows I’ve got it,” Scotland
* “The only way I can afford to pay for my TV Licence is if I sell my hamster, is that what you want me to do?” Liverpool
* “Apparently, my dog, which is a corgi, was related to the Queen’s dog, so I didn’t think I needed a TV Licence,” Northern Ireland
* “I have lost weight recently and had to buy new clothes. That’s why I could not afford to buy a TV Licence,” Manchester
* “I have not paid as I received a lethal injection,” unknown
* “I don’t want to pay for my TV Licence for a full year. Knowing my luck I’ll be dead in six months and won’t get value for money,” Wales
* “I only use my TV as a lamp. If you switch it on it gives a good glow, which allows me to read my book,” Scotland
* “I could not pay for my TV Licence because the Olympic torch was coming down my road and I could not get to the shop as the road was too busy,” London
* “Only my three-year-old son watches the TV. Can you take it out of the family allowance I receive for him? He watches it so he should pay,” Manchester
* “I could not pay as I only have two pairs of pants and they were both in the wash,” Slough
* “[Customer presents half a torn paper licence to visiting Enquiry Officer] I spend so much time at my neighbour’s house, we thought we would just share a TV Licence. My neighbour has the other half,” Soctland
* “I got caught shoplifting so I’m barred from the shop that takes PayPoint payments,” unknown
TV Licensing have had a big of a laugh – they’ve even turned three of the excuses into these hilarious videos:
But the guys at TV Licensing were also quick to remind us that it’s a criminal offence not to have a licence and you can be fined up to £1,000.