EastEnders: 7 reasons why Louise HAS to be Sharon and Keanu’s blackmailer

All the evidence points to Phil's daughter being the secret texter…

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EastEnders‘ affair storyline is hotting up now Sharon Mitchell’s fling with Keanu Taylor has been rumbled by a mysterious texter who has revealed they have evidence the blonde is cheating on her husband with the tasty toy boy. But who is in the know? Our money is on Phil’s teenage daughter, Louise.

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Shaken Sharon and her Taylor totty realised someone was on to them tonight (Monday 15 October) when Shaz received a string of texts from someone claiming they know their secret, and sent the audio file of the pair getting amorous in the Arches from when Sharon dropped her phone mid-romp and sent an unwitting voicemail to one of her contacts. There are several possible suspects, so why does Lou stick out? Let’s consider the evidence/theories…

She’s Phil’s daughter – which means maximum plot impact 
Whoever is blackmailing the illicit lovers (we’re calling it blackmail, as later this week the texter issues a shock ultimatum) they need a connection to Phil in order to have a reason to care what Sharon’s up to and a motive for making mischief – who better than Mr Mitchell’s darling daughter? Lou wouldn’t be happy if her stepmum was taking her dad for a ride, even though Sharon’s the one getting a ‘ride’ from cabbie Keanu as we’re constantly reminded by their icky chauffeur innuendo role play.

She lives in the Sharanu love nest
For a secret affair, these two are being stupidly indiscreet. Keanu is always calling at Number 55 for a spot of canoodling with his cougar at any hour of the day, perhaps one of the times Sharon purred: “Ooh, we’ve got the place to ourselves!” and chased her fella up the stairs wearing a peak cap and letting out a raucous giggle they weren’t actually alone, and Louise was in her bedroom getting an earful. Or maybe she found Keanu’s overalls stuffed down the back of the sofa?

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She’s got a history of scheming
Remember when Louise was a manipulative mean girl who ganged up with cruel classmates Madison and Alex to bully best mate Bex Fowler? She displayed a capacity for spite we’ve never quite forgotten, sending naked pics of Shakil (RIP) from Bex’s phone to the poisonous pair, just for the LOLs. She also blackmailed Abi Branning (RIP, again) for lying about being pregnant by Ben Mitchell, and put dog faeces through Denise Fox’s letterbox when she caught her shoplifting. A few ‘I know your secret’ texts is well within this lady’s MO.

She could be under the influence of her vengeful mum
Lou’s just got back from a holiday with mum Lisa Fowler. Yes, that Lisa – the one who abducted her seriously unwell daughter from a hospital bed little over a year ago to get her away from Phil, and held her hostage in a hotel room miles from home while she had a full-on nervous breakdown and Louise almost died from an infection. Has Lisa’s hatred of Phil rubbed off on her little girl after spending some time together? Could discovering Sharon’s secret fuel a sudden desire to mess with her dad’s life? Might Lisa even be pulling the strings of this blackmail plot from behind the scenes?

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She doesn’t call Sharon ‘Mum’ 
This being relevant because when Sharon’s phone made it’s ‘booty call’ while she was getting, er, serviced by Keanu in the Arches we cut to a ringing, unattended phone on a table in the cafe and the display showed the incoming call was from ‘Sharon’, which discounts the other person with a vested interest in the Mitchells’ marriage, young Dennis, as it would’ve said ‘Mum’.

She could be following in Lauren Branning’s footsteps
Remember Max and Stacey’s fling being caught on DVD and played in front of the entire Branning clan as they settled on the sofa to watch the Queen’s speech on Christmas Day 2007? Shaz and Keanu could be busted in a similar fashion – a spiteful teenage girl is in possession of digital evidence of a betrayal that could tear a family apart and cunningly stages the exposure of the secret to create maximum emotional impact. Swap moody Lauren for snippy Louise and we’ve got Stax Part 2. Surely Phil’s got to learn of the affair over the festive season? Otherwise, what’s the point?

She needs a storyline 
Apart from anything else, Louise has barely been on screen for ages and is desperate need of a plot. And there was a glimpse of her in the recent autumn trailer where she looked very miffed about something – maybe it was because she’s not getting any decent storylines?

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