Chris Pratt is sorry. He’s really sorry. But what’s he done wrong, you ask?
Well, nothing yet, but he’s got the Jurassic World press tour around the corner and he’s rather anxious. So anxious, in fact, that he’s taken to Facebook to apologise in advance for any faux pas he might commit:
“I want to make a heartfelt apology for whatever it is I end up accidentally saying during the forthcoming #JurassicWorld press tour,” he writes. “I hope you understand it was never my intention to offend anyone and I am truly sorry. I swear. I’m the nicest guy in the world. And I fully regret what I (accidentally will have) said in (the upcoming foreign and domestic) interview(s).”
It’s genius. Not only is it self deprecation at its very best, Pratt is also acknowledging how tiring and weird a world tour can be for an actor. He’ll be answering hundreds of questions (often the same one, over and over), moving from country-to-country without much rest, and generally living and breathing Jurassic World 24/7. And in all that madness, he wouldn’t be the first one to say something that fans, PRs, or fellow actors might take issue with.
“I am not in the business of making excuses. I am just dumb. Plain and simple. I try. I REALLY try! When I do (potentially) commit the offensive act for which I am now (pre) apologizing you must understand I (will likely have been) tired and exhausted when I (potentially) said that thing I (will have had) said that (will have had) crossed the line.”
The long Facebook post covers literally everything Pratt – who stars in the remake of Steven Spielberg’s 1993 classic – could possibly do wrong at any stage in the new film’s world tour…
Pre-emptive apologies are now officially The New Thing. *Runs off to find a pen and starts writing a very, very long letter*
Jurassic World is released in UK cinemas on 11th June