Take a look at Simon Cowell with a weird pink contraption on his head and you’ll basically get the gist of last night’s semi-final.
Entertaining for sure, but all a bit bonkers.
The tone was set from the word go, with Simon Cowell interrupting hosts Ant and Dec to ask where his water was.
“I’m not a waiter,” Ant spluttered as he got back to introducing the acts.
He had to ask again, but Simon eventually got his water. Thank goodness. Thank goodness.
Burlesque group Crazy Rouge kicked things off in style, but then it all just got a bit, well, odd.
Ventriloquist Sam Jones walked on stage with Baby Leo and attempted to do a whole skit about him meeting Cowell’s son baby Eric. “I knew he was Simon’s because he wears his nappy so high.” It fell awkwardly, really awkwardly, flat.
Then designer Brian Chan came out and painted on a big canvas while some models walked around wearing his designs. Simon wasn’t keen, and that was before said pink wire hat plonked on his head.
There were a few OK singing acts – little Ellis Chick belted out Cry Me A River and couldn’t bring himself to move the microphone from his mouth even while walking off stage – and Cartel livened the panel up even more.
Remember Cartel? They were the five-piece dance troupe that Simon said should ditch their oldest member Jamie. Well, it looked like he’d left the group, distraught at Simon’s advice. Then, all of a sudden he was back. Dancing his little socks off and even doing an over the top ‘I’m so exhausted’ get up off the floor at the end. This, as you can imagine, lead to a lot of calls of ‘proving Simon Cowell wrong’ and David Walliams trying to get him to apologise to camera.
Then came Yanis Marshall, Arnaud and Medhi, the French trio who dance in heels. I adore them, but it was all a bit Rylan Clark circa X Factor 2012 wasn’t it? I just had visions of Rylan sat at home patting himself on the back as he proved he was just a tad ahead of his time.
See what I mean?
Simon wasn’t sure what viewers would make of them. But after ending up in another split judges’ vote, the three ended up in the final with Lucy Kay.
And thank goodness for Lucy. She gave a flawless operatic performance of Nella Fantasia and just about held the show together. Bravo Lucy.
Emma is RadioTimes.com’s resident reality TV expert and is most likely to be found chasing Simon Cowell down the street, cancelling her social life to keep up with the latest batch of sob stories and trying to get selfies with celebrities. Emma is a chat show addict and quotes Friends more than is probably healthy.