**SPOILER ALERT. DO NOT READ ON IF YOU HAVEN’T SEEN THE GAME OF THRONES SERIES FIVE FINALE**
First came the repeated assurances from cast and crew – but we still believed. Then there was the red herring “casting” in a “film” called “Brimstone”, which we laughed off with ease. Next, the continued long hair, which made us hope once more – and now it looks like our hopes were founded. You see, the towering Jon Snow death conspiracy is finally on the brink of toppling because actor Kit Harington has been spotted on a plane to Belfast by a fan.
For months the true believers have had to deal with the cruel media lie that a fictional character died on a TV show after Harington’s night’s watchman was stabbed to death in the Game of Thrones series finale, bleeding out in the snow as the world wailed in horror and disbelief. Harington and the programme-makers said the character was really, genuinely dead and we should move on – but now the actor’s been spotted near the set just in time for filming, and we can’t imagine he’s just there to serve drinks.
Of course, some viewers (who know nothing) might dispute these findings, brainwashed as they are by the evil media illuminati. “Perhaps he’s just there to play his dead body, like Charles Dance did last series,” I hear said naysayers bleat. “Maybe he hadn’t returned Liam Cunningham’s iPod after last series, and wanted to hand it over in person. He’s that kind of guy.”
“Why can’t a guy just miss being in Ireland, and drop into filming to stare balefully at his former castmates from behind the lens while sporting a man-bun without everyone over-analysing it all the time?”
Jon Snow in series 6????
But such concerns are ridiculous and unfounded in evidence – any fool could tell Jon Snow was probably always going to come back to life as a wisecracking White Walker, or a badass talking wolf with long hair (see above), or a super-powered Melisandre smoke monster with a twinkle in his eye, or a regenerated David Tennant.
No, the horror of having to experience the exciting plot turns of an epic story in the narrative that its creators intended is finally over, thanks to the internet. Jon Snow is back – thank goodness the endless four weeks of uncertainty are finally over.
Game of Thrones will return next year