Louie Spence’s 15 fantastically frank thoughts on The Jump

“The main thing is, I’ve learnt to ski and I’ve got a whole new wardrobe of pink lycra”

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Last night dancer Louie Spence “popped” his way out of The Jump, after losing a Snow Cross battle to former rugby pro Mike Tindall and reality star Joey Essex. Louie’s slower time forced him to tackle the brand new eliminator, The Air Jump, which saw him gather up an impressive speed on skis before flinging himself off a ramp and into a giant air bag. But, despite his best efforts, the lycra-lover just lost out to JLS’s JB whose height beat him by mere inches.. 

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Fresh from a night of what we imagine involved plenty more high kicks and splits in his glamorous pink lycra, Louie gave us his deliciously honest thoughts on the show, triumphing over former rugby pro Mike Tindall and how the mood is among the celebs…

On beating Mike Tindall in the skeleton on show one:

“We are literally Yin and Yang, chalk and cheese, and I don’t think he would have been expecting me – doing my little Haka and high kicks before I went on the tea tray instead of being totally focused – was actually going to beat him.”

On Mike’s promise to prance around in skimpy underwear if he was beaten by Louie?

“We’re all going to be there as Mike struts down Compton Street in a G-String, vest, a handbag and faux fur gilet. So we’ve got something to look forward to at the end of this… Zara didn’t mind that I was having fun with Mike.”

Debriefing his Snow Cross re-match with the rugby pro:

“I literally tried to mince past Mike and Joey Essex…”

How Joey handled being tackled by Mike:

“Joey could not believe the fact Mike Tindall had taken him out. He wasn’t happy about it, I must say. I think 1) Because he thought it was a bit unsportsmanly and 2) I think it really hurt him.”

On cheering Mr Essex up:

“I did try to kiss Joey better. He wasn’t happy about it; he was running up the slopes and I just kept running after him. I put a kiss on his lips and his mouth was open and he really wasn’t happy.”

Will Tindall get a ticking off for being too rough?

“I don’t think anyone’s going to tell Mike off for being rough. Have you seen him? He’s like an Ox.”

Facing the brand new eliminator, the Air Jump:

“You can snap your leg – which they told us – and whatever you do don’t land on your head because even though you’re going into an air bag, you can break your neck… it’s a nice show because they give you all these warnings and then they throw you down it.”

On losing out to JB Gill by four inches:

“I lost out by four inches darling, it’s not that much in some terms. I can think of some times where four inches can be really important.”

He’s hanging onto those pink lycra outfits:

“The main thing is I’ve learnt to ski and I’ve got a whole new wardrobe of pink lycra. I mean, what more could I ask for?”

How he’s been coping with injuries:

“As long as it’s not broken, they’re throwing us down the mountain, darling. I mean we signed up, they paid, we’re going down regardless. They will strap us up and throw us down, unless something breaks.”

Did the right men end up on standby?

“The ones on the subs’ bench are the first two who went out, which is Dom and Phil. If they get them back on I don’t think they’d legally be allowed to go on any ski equipment. They’ve messed up a little bit there,” he jokes of the duo’s taste for the après ski.

How he’ll spend his time now:

“It’s great for me. I get to go around Austria. Well, Innsbruck. It’s not quite Oxford Street or Bond Street…

“But I get to sit in our nice brown hotel. We’ve got a lovely brown hotel. It’s got brown carpets; it’s up the walls even. It’s lovely. Very retro 70s.”

On the mood among the celebs:

“We’re all getting on fantastically. But I must admit, now the competition has started, there are a few people that are very competitive. Lady Victoria….”

Any romance?

“I’ve knocked on everyone’s door and I’m having no luck. I am married.”

On potential winners:

“The people that are left are very competitive. Even our little Stacey Solomon. She’s a dark horse who’s good at everything. She slips through and is really surprising everyone on this job I think.”

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The Jump continues tonight at 8:00pm on Channel 4