99 problems and tonight the TV is one of them. Yep, it’s here again: the 9pm battle. Big shows. Big decisions. Thank goodness for on demand and the fact that we can record things.

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Basically - if you can - station yourself in front of the TV from 7.30pm. It’s Still Open All Hours on BBC1 up first. A gentle amuse-bouche if you will. Then 8.00pm rolls around and it’s a brand new series of Top Gear. Singer Ed Sheeran is the Star in a Reasonably Priced Car and Jeremy Clarkson and co are bound to smash up some poor defenceless caravan, or something of the sort. They’ve promised they won't cause anymore controversy. We’ll see.

Then it’s 9.00pm (short intake of breathe) and there are some clashes.

In the blue corner it’s the penultimate episode of Last Tango in Halifax’s third series, boasting both proposals and arrests. In the red corner it’s the return of Dragons’ Den after a mid-series break. It’s the last time this particular line-up of Dragons will take their seats, with both Duncan Bannatyne and Kelly Hoppen saying ‘I’m out!’ to the show. Over in the yellow (geddit?) corner it's a brand new series of Mr Selfridge, with Rosalie’s wedding and the addition of Zoë Wanamaker with a thick Russian accent to boot. And if you’ve been following the many twists and turns of Celebrity Big Brother, the drama continues in the, er, purple corner at 9.00pm too.

Tricky, tricky, tricky.

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Personally, I’d hop from Top Gear to Dragons’ Den. Then, with a social media blackout (no spoilers, thank you very much) move to ITV +1 to catch Mr Selfridge an hour later. Last Tango in Halifax can be caught up with on iPlayer some time during the week. As for Big Brother, someone at work will know the goss, eh? Voilà.

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