Judges Karen Barber and Jason Gardiner are normally the ones to be found grimacing at every comment the other makes, if not openly denouncing each other as morons throughout the show. But it’s softly spoken Head Judge Robin Cousins that has been feuding with Jason this week, after a backlash from viewers following the loss of Shayne Ward when Matt Lapinskas took a tumble in the skate-off. Of course we’re not suggesting this is a Mike Tyson vs Lennox Lewis scenario, or indeed anywhere close to fisticuffs. It’s much more like David Attenborough politely asking Stephen Fry to step outside, before sharing a few cucumber sandwiches and a pot of tea while apologising after every curse word.
Defending his decision to save a tumbling Matt over Shayne, Robin Tweeted, “The skate off IS about those performances. Shayne’s clean skate a 5. Matt (had he gone clean) an 8, take off 2 points for mistake, a 6. End of!” Blimey, one almost senses he’s loosened his tie.
Even without targeting this directly at Jason, having been the only judge to support Shayne, Jason appears to have taken this as a direct jab, replying, “Thanks for all your support. In the skate-off mistakes should count. We got rid of Pammy week 1 and it should be no different #stick2rules.”
Loving the caps lock button, Robin swiftly replied, “Please don’t confuse the level of Matt’s routine with Pamela A’s. It wasn’t even close. Technically SO superior tonight, even with the trip!” Hate to break it to you Robster, but we were all far too busy looking at Pammy’s boobs popping out to notice if she was doing any forward cross-overs or solo skating.
Out on the front line presenter Phillip Schofield took to trying to defend the show’s format from an angry public tweeting, “Spoke to the judges and Chris. Their view is that Matt was still considerably better, even with a stumble!” No word from Jayne Torvill – she was probably too busy sobbing into her ‘I Love Shayne’ T-shirt. Poor gal.
In other news, Beth Tweddle is the latest celeb victim of the ice-curse, reportedly breaking up with her long-term boyfriend. Presumably it hasn’t got anything to do with all the bottom-grabbing going on in her performance with pro-skater Dan Whiston on Sunday night’s show, but we’re getting the feeling Dancing On Ice should consider a name change. Dumping on Ice doesn’t quite conjure up the right mood – sounds more like someone’s dog couldn’t quite make it to the lamppost in time – but perhaps Flirting On Ice would be more appropriate, given that Pamela Anderson, Samia Ghadie and now Beth have all ended up single or linked to their pro partners since taking part in the show.
The after show drinks session on Sunday eve saw bottom two casualty Samia dancing around in jubilation after just about being saved by the public, while Matt was seen looking like a lost puppy, getting a rather over-the-top pep talk (there was a lot of hand gesturing and wide open mouth talking going on) from his skating partner Brianne, seemingly telling him to get over the fact that they’d been in the bottom two. Gareth Thomas was in a different mood, joking to the Metro that he has never grabbed so many boobs in his whole life and that his bum is rock hard like two chestnuts. Swings and roundabouts and all that.