Wholesale changes are expected this season as Dutch enforcer Louis van Gaal brutally remodels Manchester United – but surely the new gaffer isn't going to make his players swap faces.
That was the nightmare scenario foreseen this morning by a hilariously inaccurate TV teamsheet for the United v Inter friendly, put up by none other than MUTV, Man U's own channel.
Only Ashley Young and Danny Welbeck emerged with their identities intact, as the in-house propaganda machine merrily confused Anders Lindegaard and David de Gea, replaced the likeness of Luis Antonio Valencia with the quite different mug of Luke Shaw, and lumbered Spanish pretty-boy playmaker Juan Mata with the hairy potato face of Wayne Rooney.
Social media users were quick to spot the error:
Staff at the FedEx Field in Washington, DC joined in with the fun, bafflingly re-labelling their stadium – because United were nominally the home team – as "Old Traddord".
Manchester United won the match on penalties after a 0-0 draw, with the winning kick struck by Darren Fletcher. Or as MUTV know him, Ander Herrera.