The Crawleys and their staff are nothing if not melodramatic.
Whether Mrs Patmore's serving lumpy gravy or there's a dead diplomat in their bed, you can be sure to get a good reaction out of them. But do you know Downton Abbey well enough to tell the difference between a big drama and a tiny one?
What's happening here...?
a) Bates has just got down on bended knee and proposed to lovely Anna. And she's said yes!
b) There's a fair in town and Mrs Hughes is giving her the day off. Helter skelter, here we come...
c) She's just helped Lady Sybil put on her first pair of trousers. Fancy.
a) His wife Mary has just gone into labour. Quick! To the hospital!
b) The Crawley's have run out of marmalade. At breakfast time. What's Mrs Patmore playing at?
c) Matthew's just been informed that he is the new heir to Downton Abbey. On the up, eh?
a) Robert is having a stand off with Branson. That damn chauffeur, making eyes at his impressionable daughter...
b) His dinner shirts have gone missing. Missing, I say!
c) There's trouble in paradise. Cora is relagating him to the guest bedroom... and he's not happy about it.
a) She's just been introduced to the notion of "A Weekend". Funny how the lower classes live...
b) Robert is being obtuse, again. How did she produce such an infuriating son?
c) Martha Levinson is being American. At the dinner table. And it's putting her off her beef wellington.
a) Robert has lost all the money. ALL THE MONEY. Does the fool not care at all for her fortune?
b) Matthew has announced his engagment to Lavinia. Him and Mary aren't talking. We are back to square one.
c) Sybil is running off with the chauffeur. Can you imagine the scandal?
a) Britain is at war. And Downton is being turned into a convalescent home. What on earth will the neighbours say?
b) The oven has broken. And they are going to have an "indoors picnic". What could possibly be worse?
c) Edith has announced that she plans to be a journalist. Of all the careers she could choose...
a) Jimmy thinks he's better at carrying stuff than Alfred. But no one else does. (He's got a short fuse.)
b) He's caught Thomas staring at him. AGAIN.
c) Thomas is smoking inside. You know how the smell gets caught in Jimmy's lovely locks...
a) It's Matthew and Mary's first married night at the Abbey. And Matthew's assumed they'll always be sharing a bed...
b) A strange, uninvited Turkish man has just walked into her room. And is hoping to get lucky.
c) Anna has suggested she wear an entirely inappropriate gown to dinner. For christ's sake. As if.
C, C, B, A, C, B, A, B
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