This exclusive clip from the opening number of Saturday night’s episode features the judge dressed as the leader of a marching band / cult as the hopefuls strip off and do forward rolls across the stage.
No, we have no idea what’s going on either. All we know is it’s flipping funny and verges on the downright bizarre.
For five minutes, the wholesome BBC1 show looks more like a performance by the Chippendales as the chaps whip off their tops to belt out Bros hit When Will I Be Famous? as Dannii stomps around the stage blowing a whistle and barking orders like “GIVE ME EVERYTHING YOU’VE GOT” and “LOUDER”.
Some of the (clothed) blokes then assemble in a line and do a synchronised dance that firmly belongs in a 1980s electro club, spinning their arms like out of control robots to allegedly prove they can dance.
The bonkers sequence even rivals that opener in episode one where Barlow stripped off (what’s with all the stripping off? This is a teatime family show, Gary!) and got in the shower for his own four-minute mini-musical about the fame game.
At this rate, next week’s first live show is going to open with Martin Kemp taking his clothes off to reveal himself painted GOLD. And let’s face it, stranger things have happened on Let It Shine.
Let It Shine airs at 6.40pm on Saturday February 4 on BBC1.