King of Stand up
For me, it’s undoubtedly Stewart Lee. He’s a risk taker and his content is always unusual and exciting. Often stand-up doesn’t work very well on TV, but his BBC2 show, Stewart Lee’s Comedy Vehicle, was proof that it can.
Queen of Sitcom
Miranda Hart. Her BBC1 sitcom, Miranda, is genuinely very funny. Sitcoms have been written off as old-fashioned but she’s proved that they can still work well.
EastEnders. A show written in a hurry that takes itself very seriously - it was always perfect TV Burp fodder.
Funniest sporting moment
The Diamond Jubilee Pageant. It’s odd that they never announced the winner of the Flotilla. There were a lot of boats involved and the Queen had a head start, but I’m still waiting to find out who won.
Best comedy newcomer
There’s this bunch called the Alternative Comedy Memorial Society who I bumped into in the clubs and I think they’re heading for great things. Keep an eye out for Karl Schultz and Holly Burns.
Funniest reality TV moment
The funniest moment of this year’s X Factor was in the auditions when there was a homeless man who didn’t get through and they said, “You’re going home”. You can’t write that stuff.
Best comedy writers
Sam Bain and Jesse Armstrong (Peep Show, Fresh Meat) have got the comedy sitcom world sewn up. They can’t put a foot wrong. They work really hard at what they do and are also very nice people.
Best chat show host
You can’t fit a cigarette paper between Graham Norton, Alan Carr and Jonathan Ross. But if I was going to go on one, I’d have to say Ross.
Funniest radio show
Danny Baker’s BBC London show. I was a big fan, up until the BBC axed it. That’s how they work now - if something’s too good, it needs to be culled.
Favourite TV Burp
The three-minute song tribute to property show presenter Amanda Lamb. It still tickles me. What’s more, Amanda also loved it and has actually put it on her phone as a ringtone.
The Bond film Skyfall was good, if a little short on laughs. But my favourite film of the year was a documentary, Searching for Sugar Man. It’s a true story and really compelling.
Boris Johnson tries too hard so I’m ruling him out. Ed Miliband is funny without really trying - and he looks like a cartoon character, so he gets my vote.
Sports personality of the year
It’s time they gave it to one of the horses. They work really hard and win all the races and yet every year they’re excluded from Sports Personality of the Year. It’s not like they haven’t got a personality.
It’s not fashionable to say, but I really like what they’ve done with the Go Compare adverts. I think it’s actually quite funny how they’ve subverted it and turned the annoying singer into a hate figure. I’m not sure I’m ready to make a cameo appearance in it, though. I’ve actually got my eye on a Churchill ad now that Martin Clunes has been dropped.
Is TV Burp really finished?
Yes, I’m afraid it’s all over. I still look out for burps while I’m watching television, it’s just that I don’t write them down any more. Now I just turn to my wife and children and say, “Look! That looks just like an elephant carrying a briefcase”. And they laugh and that’s enough for me these days.
British Comedy Awards 2012 are on tonight at 9:00pm on Channel 4