This Ned Flanders-themed metal band is gre-diddly-ate!

Hi-diddly-ho – AAAAAAAAAARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHH!!!

We’ve all been there – you’re trying to think of a suitably tough, anti-establishment and downright scary image to promote your metal band, but nothing’s working. You’ve tried pawing through Paradise Lost for names of demons, skimming through imdb’s horror section and even flipping through the “nasty injuries” section of a medical textbook – all to no avail.

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You’ve almost given up hope, resigned to returning to a life without regular musical screaming – but then your eye alights on something tucked away at the bottom of your DVD collection. A flash of yellow, green and brown. You gently slide it out, and just stare at it. It’s arresting, daring – something nobody would expect. A creeping figure of dread that will ensure your band’s name will live on in metal history.

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Yes, this is the news that one US metal band has adopted The Simpsons’ Ned Flanders as its terrifying image of choice, calling themselves Okilly Dokilly (the character’s catch-phrase superimposed with “Kill”, to make the point), dressing in Ned’s inimitable style and writing many of their songs around the mild-mannered Christian.