Waggling a dildo around on live TV is not big or clever. But at least it adds a bit of colour (in this case, it was purple)...

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Now that Sky Sports News has banned fans from its transfer deadline day coverage, there's no frenzied atmosphere to support the idea that this is chock full of exciting, informative breaking news – rather than mostly repeated rumours and the occasional update on a youth team loan deal.

Without the fans it's just men in suits standing in car parks, reporting on... well, cars mostly (who could be driving? Where are they going? Who's paid for the petrol?)

No wonder people are calling this the most boring transfer deadline day ever.

Instead of wondering whether some clever sod would ruffle reporter David Craig's hair, the biggest controversy so far has been Gary Neville's neckwear.

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It was Sky Sports that encouraged the supporters to get involved – setting up cameras outside football grounds and hinting at a bit of good news after that depressing January defeat.

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Sky banned dildo-waving fans because it wanted to add a semblance of seriousness to its coverage. Unfortunately, all it did was highlight what a load of balls deadline day really is.

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