10. Star Trek V: the Final Frontier (1989)
Now, I won’t hear a word against the much-derided campfire scene (“I love Row, do you know Row Row Row Your Boat?”). Who knows? Maybe I’m just a sucker for Kirk in a pair of stonewashed jeans. But the storyline in this Shatner-directed outing is pretty lean. A hitherto-unmentioned half-brother of Spock’s takes over the ship and whisks them to Paradise – all of which seems to be an excuse just to have Kirk outwit the Almighty. An Almighty who isn’t, of course, God at all. Because, as we all know, only Kirk is a true deity in this galaxy.
9. Star Trek: the Motion Picture (1979)
Also known as the Slow Motion Picture or the Motionless Picture. And with good reason: if you excise Kirk’s leisurely cruise past the Enterprise and Spock’s deep dive into the mysteries of V’ger, then there ain’t much of a movie left. But what saves it is the V’ger probe’s incursion onto the bridge and its assimilation of Ilia – it’s probably the most alien and otherworldly moment in all of Trek. Freaky, disconcerting and visually impressive.
8. Star Trek Generations (1994)
A muddled and sombre transition from the small to the big screen for Picard’s crew and one that suffers thanks to some overlong hand-holding from Kirk and a humourless story preoccupied with death and loss. However, the Enterprise D has never looked better, Patrick Stewart really makes you feel for Picard when he reveals all about his nephew’s demise, while the crash landing of the ship into Veridian III is suitably cinematic. Plus Data curses.