Q: What gets knocked back in Love Island quicker than a round of Sambucas on a night out in Magaluf?
Deluded takes on a whole new meaning in tonight’s Love Island when Kem assumes things with Amber are a done deal – only for her to put him firmly back in his place.
In what will make for excruciating-cum-hilarious television, Kem is going on and on (and on) about Amber like they’re already madly in love.
“Every time me and Amber talk we get on more and more. We’ve just clicked so much. I reckon tonight we’re going to share a bed, even though we’re not coupled.”
He goes on: “I’m going to take Amber outside to our romantic bed and we’re going to have a little smooch hopefully, little cuddle, get to know each other. Anything more? Who knows? If not we’ll just chill, have a good night and we’ll see what happens.”
Woah, hold your horses there Kem. You might want to have spoken to Amber about all of this first.
“He isn’t putting it on me tonight. I’m not having that. I’m not into that.”
When Kem then invites Amber out to the bed area, she hits back with:
“Babe I’m not staying here. The reason why me and Harley aren’t coupling up is because he was too pushy with me, I didn’t like it.”
Their conversation then goes something like this:
Amber: “I’ll tell you when we can kiss. You’re not putting it on me.”
Kem: “I didn’t want it to come across like that. That’s not me. It’s not me! I don’t know why you think it is?”
Um, maybe because you had THIS to say about women before entering the Love Island villa, Kem?!
Anyway, Amber responds with:
“I think it is. I think you’ve made it very clear that you do what you want. In the challenge yesterday…I’m going to be honest, I’m anxious about me and you.”
We reckon she has every right to be worried about Kem. You’re better off staying well clear, love.
After asking if he seems like a pushy person (he does), Amber tells Kem that she didn’t want to stay coupled up with Harley – despite sharing a kiss with him on the first night. “He was too intense with me and I think now I feel smothered,” she says.
“Do you know what was the worst thing about last night?” asks Kem later on, clearly licking his wounds. “It wasn’t what happened, because nothing really happened bad. It was how much I bigged it up before. What was I thinking? Straightaway she was like ‘are you going to try to put it on me?’ and it just made it all really awkward. It’s my fault for getting too excited before.”
Far from a true, pure love, Amber simply puts what she and Kem shared down to “flirty banter”. Oh dear.
“There’s tension there. There’s chemistry. The reason me and Harley weren’t working out was because he was too pushy and too full on with me. Me and Kem have only had two conversations, I don’t want him to put it on me.”
Well it’s now pretty much certain that Kem isn’t going to be putting it (whatever ‘it’ is, we’d rather not know) anywhere else either. His pairing Chloe is so desperate to get rid of him, she can’t give Kem away. Chloe even goes so far as to say she would be “absolutely over the moon” for someone else to take him off her hands.
Although that person now probably isn’t going to be Amber.
Love Island continues tonight at 9pm on ITV2