This week, Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens director JJ Abrams sensationally revealed a key detail from the upcoming film on Jimmy Kimmel Live, a fact which is bound to have the fans hyped up in a frenzy of excitement and anticipation.
Apparently – and stay calm, guys, because this is pretty heady stuff – the first word of the film will be…“this”.
We know. Intense stuff. But what words could come after “this”? Will the first sentence in this long-awaited film be just Han Solo pointing at things, or a earth-shaking plot revelation?
We’ve lined up a few likely candidates.
This… have a bad feeling about, do I
This…is Jar Jar Binks, the leader of the Resistance and a key part of every plan we have for the next 2 and a half hours
This…midi-chlorian lecture is crucial to the plot, and we all need to sit down and listen to it for some time.
This…clone of young Anakin Skywalker is sure to help the war effort, and lift a few spirits!
This…is Luke Skywalker, who’s evil now. And sometimes played by an Ewok.
This… IS the droid you’re looking for…oh wait, crap.
Of course, now we think about it “this” might not be the start of a spoken sentence at all. Rather, it could be part of the film’s opening crawl, in which case we might end up with something quite…different
This…is STILL a period of civil war, which you kinda might have thought would clear up after Return of the Jedi. But noooo.
This…film will inevitably be a bit of a letdown because it’s been so over-hyped – so in future, set your expectations low and you’ll go through life feeling more at peace and less disappointed. May the force be with you.
This…time at least George Lucas isn’t involved, so sit back, relax and enjoy the movie. You’re SAFE.
Or, if we’re lucky, it could be something even better – a musical number for Andy Serkis’ Dark Lord of the Sith, anyone? Play it, Will!
This… is the saga all about how, my lightsaber flip-turned upside down
It might take a few movies so sit down folks
I’ll tell you how I became the Empire’s Supreme Leader Snoke
Yep, we’ve cracked it – it’s definitely going to be one of those.
Star Wars Episode VII: The Force Awakens is released on 17th December