If you thought EL James had already achieved world domination with her sexy stories, you’d be mistaken. Not one to rest on her laurels, the British author has penned another novel, this time retelling Ana and Christian’s steamy flirtation from Christian’s point of view.
It’s a pulse-quickening prospect, which managed to top the best-seller list two weeks before its official release. But when it comes to what’s between Grey’s bound covers, we’ve got criteria. There are a few important questions we’d like answered. For starters…
Is there anything going on behind those steel(e) grey eyes?
Christian Grey is obviously dreamily good looking and a successful entrepreneur but he’s the quiet, brooding type. He doesn’t say that much. We presume because he’s so – to borrow from Meredith Grey (no relation) – “dark and twisty” inside. But is he really?
What IS Christian thinking?
We are so in Ana’s head in the Fifty Shades novels, Christian Grey becomes the teeniest bit two dimensional. He’s all growled sentences, narrowed eyes and rock hard abs. What we’d really like to know? What he’s thinking about while gazing gloomily over Seatle’s skyline or driving around with Anastasia in his passenger seat. Is it his terribly troubled and all-consuming past? Is he, like Ana, searching hopelessly for a good metaphor – “his voice is warm and husky like dark melted chocolate fudge caramel… or something” – or dreaming of x-rated popsicles? Is he mentally refurbishing his red room? Thinking creepy thoughts? Or wondering what the football scores are and trying to remember whether he’s run out of fabric softener? We kind of hope it’s the latter.
Is he as endlessly shocked as she is?
Ana’s narration is all gasps, flushes, “double crap”s and breathless exclamations of “Holy cow!” This wobbly-kneed girl rarely anticipates anything. “Jeez.” But EL James’ new literary venture should shed a little light on whether the Grey/Steele romance was really so jaw-dropping. Were things really springing, ripping and being constantly earth-shatttering. Or is Ana just a little bit of a drama queen?
Just what does he do all day?
We know Christian is terribly successful and powerful – he’s got a helicopter and a swish apartment to prove it – but we’re still not super clear on what he does all day to make his millions. In fact, aside from hiring pretty blonde assistants, making sure his office floors are polished at all times and drafting sex contracts for his lovers, we’re clueless. Fingers crossed Grey is going to reveal how Christian actually spends his time.
Does he have an Inner Goddess too?
We know Anastasia’s Inner Goddess pretty intimately. Unfortunately. EL James’ three steamy stories are littered with references to Ana’s salsa-dancing, pole-vaulting, foot-tapping, back-flipping, panting, pleading, pirouetting, cartwheeling, drooling, cheerleading, clapping, jumping, roaring Inner Goddess. Her musings, facial expressions and penchant for doing the merengue make her almost a main character in her own right. And we’re about to find out whether Christian has an equally irritating Inner God. An Internal Sultan? A Secret Khan? Interior Prince? Hidden Baron? Subconcious Dictator? We can’t wait to find out…
EL James’ Grey is published 18th June