It’s safe to say TOWIE star and current I’m A Celebrity campmate Gemma Collins is not backwards at coming forwards. If she wants to tell you what’s going on in her bowels, she’s going to do it. If she wants to shove tampons up her nose to make it through the smell of said bowel movements, that’s gonna happen too.
Gemma’s stuck in the Celebrity Slammer – a jail in the middle of the jungle – with only porridge to eat. Coronation Street’s Craig Charles, model and singer Nadia Forde and Allo’ Allo’ actress Vicki Michelle have been there to keep her company. Or rather, to listen to her many honest outpourings.
Here’s what we learned about the Essex lass during tonight’s second episode of I’m A Celebrity:
1. Gemma’s poo is currently fluorescent. Host Ant jokes he’s “no doctor”, but that doesn’t sound right. Dec laughed, “You could read a book by the light of it”. Lovely.
2. She also thinks she’s got malaria. Yes, malaria. Again, Ant’s no doctor, but he’s pretty sure she’s not got malaria.
3. Gemma can lift Craig Charles up with her feet. Ta-dah…
4. Gemma’s ideal man is Ray Winston. Yep, she likes an older man.
5. The TOWIE star is not happy that murderers get three meals a day in jail. Not happy at all, given her own current ham sandwich-less stretch. Not even a packet of Quavers on the side.
6. Gemma can’t knit. A challenge was set to knit to earn biscuits. But, well, if you can’t knit, you can’t knit, eh? She’s happy she’ll never have to do it again, giving up on the quest to earn the tasty snack. “Thank god for machines”.
7. She’s worried her hair is going to fall out because of the hunger. But is never going to say that again after Craig gives her a lesson in how many people are starving around the world.
The wit and wisdom of Gemma Collins will continue Wednesday night as I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here! returns at 9:00pm on ITV.