Borg mini-fridge will assimilate your sandwiches

Star Trek cooler has space for Seven of Nine to keep her six pack

Modern journalism is a succession of freebies and adverts masquerading as articles, with promising young writers assimilated into a homogenised army of PR spouting robot-zombies. We have made too many compromises. Like Captain Picard faced with the Borg in Star Trek: First Contact, we must take a stand. The line must be drawn HEE-YAH! This far, no further!


That is why I have taken the brave decision to tell you about this Star Trek mini-fridge, despite not having (yet) received one.

A replica of the Borg spaceship first seen in Next Generation episode ‘Q Who’, the fridge features everything you would expect from the bad guys: harsh geometry, an eerie green glow and enough space for Seven of Nine to keep her six pack. Using advanced nanotechnology, the fridge can either be set to make it so, so cold, or warm up to keep your earl grey hot.

(In real life the interior of a Borg ship is kept warm and humid, the optimum operating environment for their cybernetic implants. Not that I care about such things.)

I must restate that I haven’t (yet) used one, and you won’t see me begging for a Borg Cube mini-fridge to be sent to my office immediately, no matter how great the temptation. At $149.99 from ThinkGeek, it might not seem worth sacrificing your journalistic integrity, to which I say: we haven’t actually crossed that bridge yet. Let’s see if the bridge arrives, and decide whether we should cross it as/when, alright?


Oh who am I kidding? Resistance is futile.