Goodness knows why that Nikki keeps boomeranging back. Every time she shows up, someone either throws some Christmas dinner at her or launches her into a pile of bin bags. But here she is again, deluding herself that a reunion with Terry is on the cards. Fingers crossed he sets her straight and we get to see those stilettos clattering off into the sunset for the final time.
Carol is still in two minds about whether to go ahead with Tina’s illegal scheme and seeks advice from Dot. Come on, Carol, we talking about Dot here. At the first sign of anything less than legit, all she’ll do is down two medicinal sweet sherries and quote three relevant passages from the Bible.
Mark Radcliffe counts down the ten most successful songs of all time, in terms of money earned — so that’s cover versions, re-releases and licensing for adverts and movies, as well as record sales by the original artist. This makes for a great guessing game. Most of the bestselling singles aren’t there; an American act that isn’t Michael Jackson has two entries, and if you predict the number one you can award yourself a small prize.
It’s a slightly low-budget presentation, with a limited roster of talking heads: music hack David Hepworth should really push to have his name included in the title. But on top of the list, the chat and the clips are great tales of the day a classic song was composed, as well as juicy facts about how royalties are divvied up.
Followers of Robert Popper’s agonising sitcom will remember Mr Morris, the angry old weirdo who inveigled himself into the affections of Grandma – Jackie’s 80-year-old mum. Mr Morris has a Hitler moustache, a high opinion of himself and an appalling temper, as he showed last time he visited the house.
And now Grandma’s coming to dinner, she has invited him, and they can’t stop mentioning their erotic adventures. “Jackie you should be happy for me, I’m a sexually satisfied woman!” purrs Grandma, as Mr Morris accuses everyone of being a punk rocker.
It’s a perfect storm of ghastliness for the Goodmans, which only gets worse when they head off on a celebratory trip to the bowling alley.
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