I’m A Celebrity 2013: Educating Joey Essex

From telling the time to an unusual use for tampons, the TOWIE star is learning a lot in the jungle

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TOWIE star Joey Essex probably thought he would learn a few things about living outdoors, eating bugs and what his hair does without access to products during his time in the jungle. But Joey’s learning far more than that. Welcome to Educating Joey Essex…

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Lesson 1: Telling the time

Watches may be “well old-fashioned” in Joey land, but he’s learnt that telling the time is far more interesting when a model teaches you. He was so happy he celebrated with an ‘I can tell the time’ dance. 


Lesson 2: Purple water is a myth

It’s official – swimming pool water doesn’t turn purple when you pee in it. Joey’s checked with gold medal-winning swimmer Rebecca Adlington no less, and the urban myth turns out to be just that. Joey can presumably now go about his pool peeing business guilt-free…


Lesson 3: Scorpions taste like Marmite on toast 

Crunching his way through a scorpion, Joey decided it tasted rather like Marmite on toast and looked as if he was mentally noting it down as a worthy snack. It’ll probably go well with all of that gut pork he’s been eating…


Lesson 4: How to lose weight

Joey has learned from EastEnders star Laila that sex is the only way to keep skinny. “It does work. I went from a 16 to just under 14,” Laila insisted. So Joey will know to run for the hills should she suggest any sort of group exercise…


Lesson 5: Tampons are a camper’s best friend

Forget rubbing two sticks together – Joey Essex and his campmates have discovered a useful survival trick. The fluffy end of a tampon helps light a fire. Handy for next year’s bonfire night perhaps?

I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here! 2013 continues Wednesday evening at 9:00pm on ITV


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