I’m A Celebrity 2013 day 1: Tears, trials, tampons – and TOWIE star Joey Essex

Matthew Wright cried, Alfonso Ribeiro cried and Joey Essex introduced us to the concept of "confrontating"

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I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here! is back (yay!) and there was the usual opening horror for the celebs with bungee jumps from helicopters and insect-infested trials. Plus there was a snazzy new race across a deserted island to win a final night of luxury – and the best campmates.

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Yes, as if jungle life wasn’t set to be bad enough, the less sporty celebrities were made to feel like the crap kid in PE as other contestants were picked over them. Just to rub it in, Ant and Dec got to zip around on a smart speed boat dishing out challenges.

But amongst all that’s new on I’m a Celeb this year, there’s one new thing that really stands out. Joey Essex.

The TOWIE star has already assured us he’s not going to be all about “confrontating” anyone. He’ll only “confrontate” if he feels “confrontated” himself (not that we needed any more “confrontating” after being exposed to Joey’s blindingly white teeth and distressingly short shorts). The urban dictionary confirms, “Nobody can confrontate coz confrontate isn’t a word,” which sounds very much like Joey wrote the definition himself.

Confrontate. I’ll just mark that down as new word number one.

Joey’s also discovered that it “snows” in Australia in the summer (it was hail stones) and that you can light a fire using a tampon. As long as you “go for the fluffy end” while trying to spark a flame. Bear Grylls eat your heart out.

And while EastEnders actress Laila Morse said she’d be up for eating testicles and penis “as long as it wasn’t hard” (ahem) it’s Joey who’ll be facing TV host Matthew Wright in tomorrow night’s Bushtucker challenge, Monday Night Takeaway.

Joey will be fighting to earn stars (and therefore food) for Snake Rock campmates model Amy Willerton, swimmer Rebecca Adlington, snooker ace Steve Davis and Laila. His competitor Matthew Wright, who, as predicted, has already cried several times, will attempt to chomp on various animal parts to feed his Crock Creek campmates, actor Alfonso Ribeiro, Westlife star Kian Egan, fashion designer David Emanuel and Emmerdale actress Lucy Pargeter.

Let’s hope they’ve both got the stomachs to, er, confrontate, this challenge.

I’m A Celebrity… Get Me Out Of Here! continues tonight 9:00pm on ITV


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