Fresh Meat season 3: Jack Whitehall – “I cannot be left alone with a vibrator”

JP isn't the only one with a childish sense of humour, as Kimberley Nixon and Charlotte Ritchie reveal the comedian's dildo pranks...

Jack Whitehall’s sense of humour is just as puerile as JP’s… It hardly comes as a surprise, does it?

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According to the cast and crew of Fresh Meat, the comedian has enjoyed many a dildo-based prank during his time on the show. Kimberley Nixon, who plays Josie, told RadioTimes.com, “Jack did a take when he walked up to me in the pub with a dildo with houmous on it sticking out of his trousers.”

“Why is it always dildos?” pitched in Charlotte Ritchie, aka Oregon. “Last year it was a dildo that he strapped to the inside of his leg.” 

“Jack Whitehall has such access to dildos, it’s quite frightening,” concluded Kimberley. 

With the evidence against him mounting, we questioned the man himself during a visit to the set of Fresh Meat earlier this year. “There was a scene with a vibrator,” he admitted. “It’s a life lesson I’ve learnt, that I cannot be allowed to be left alone with a vibrator. I can’t be trusted with it!” 

The man behind posh toff JP also admitted to falling victim to the ageing process: “We’re worried about looking older. Joe’s actually forty. He’s spent his whole life playing children and then teenagers and then students.”

“I frisked away my twenties pretending to be a teenager,” added Joe, “and when I’m thirty I’m going to have a nervous breakdown – that’s basically the problem.”

“I reckon you’ll go from baby-faced to Mickey Rourke in one year,” Jack predicted. 

However, the pair have hatched a plan for how Fresh Meat could deal with their inevitable ageing. “We can do one ten years later like Skins did,” suggested Jack. “After we’ve grown up and have jobs. Kingsley would be working for some cringe magazine, something alternative. And JP would be ruining people’s lives in the city making ludicrous investments. He’d be the rogue stockbroker.”

Whitehall also let slip details of one of the series’ newest cast members, Mexican beefcake Javier, who has travelled across the world to continue his passionate affair with Vod. “To use a word of my mother’s, he’s a bit of a crumpet,” explained Jack. “Although he’s actually from Mexico, whatever their equivalent is there. A tostada.”

Fresh Meat begins tonight at 10pm on Channel 4 

Read about what’s new in Fresh Meat series three


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