The Apprentice week five: Stuart Baggs The Brand gets a sweat on

Want to look as fit and healthy as everyone's favourite Apprentice reject? Then watch this...

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Stuart Baggs The Brand sounded rather out of breath when we phoned him this week to enquire after his latest Apprentice preview.

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“Are you OK, Stuart Baggs The Brand?” we asked.

“Fine…fine. Just…worn out,” he wheezed in response.

“Worn out?” we enquired. “Why, what have you been doing?”

“….video,” he gasped, after a further minute’s panting.

“But, Stuart Baggs The Brand, all we wanted was a simple no-nonsense video. A piece to camera. A few words, perhaps, on the business acumen displayed by the contestants in this week’s task. How on Earth can that have exerted you to this extent?”

His reply was incomprehensible, but all became clear when the video arrived.

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We’ll try and coax some proper punditry out of him next time.