1. All you need for Christmas
Some of Mariah Carey's recorded output isn't to my taste, I'll admit. In fact, none of it is except one song - but the good one, All I Want for Christmas Is You, is an unimpeachable classic, the second-best festive record of all time (after Darlene Love, obv). This week the song brought us this unutterably charming throwaway by US talk show host Jimmy Fallon, his house band the Roots, and Carey herself.
The kids popping up to do backing vocals, Carey wrestling with the impossible high notes, Fallon's inability to sing and drum simultaneously, the knitwear… it's hard to know what's the most cute and lovely and Christmassy thing about this.
Not Christmassy per se but with warmth glowing right out of it: the British Paraorchestra, guided by symphonic dude Charles Hazlewood, perform Cyndi Lauper's True Colours.
Team that gem with this film remembering some of the best bits of the Paralympics and enjoy a colossal blub.
3. He's made Christmas his own
A new contender enters the Christmas No1 fray: Johnny Robinson! Off of out of the X Factorz!
Johnny, whose teeth and glasses each have their own agent, delivers a pleasant enough swingy thing, marred slightly by his quacky falsetto. The ad lib at the end probably needed to go, too.
4. I don't think Yule like it
Completing our slide from the sublime to the ridiculous is this already notorious festive hoedown about the universal ritual of piloting your own jet back home for Christmas, reuniting John Travolta and Olivia Newton-John. Have they still got that old Grease magic? No.
Travolta's felt-tipped hair, the line dancing, the eternal run-and-hug, the bit with the disappointed soldier, the direction in general – this truly is a complete sack of gifts.
5. Little Mis
And finally, is the prospect of being dragged to Les Misérables overshadowing your Christmas? Make the case that there's no need to fork out on a trip to the cinema – this video by comedian Vikki Stone, where she plays all the parts herself, is enough.
Great coathanger hat, there.