Geordie Shore: series two phrasebook

Do you know your tash on from your gan doon the toon? A guide to terms you might hear on the MTV reality show

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Just when you thought there wasn’t room for any more reality television in your life, MTV delivers a second series of Geordie Shore, tonight from 10pm.

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There will be plenty of boozing, boobs, six packs, scraps and spray tans again this year – after all, if they removed those elements there wouldn’t be much of a show. But on top of all those (good) things, there’s also a couple of new faces joining the house of debauchery in the shape of 18-year-old Rebecca Walker and Ricci Guarnaccio, an “uber-confident” 26-year-old.

But if, like us, you find the heady cocktail of inebriated stars and their strong Geordie accents a little tricky to follow, there is hope.

Here’s a rundown of some of the words and phrases that you might hear uttered during series two…

Mortal – I have consumed a good deal of alcohol and thus lost control of my senses.  There is a rather high chance of me not remembering what I said and did last night.  Being mortal can be used as an excuse for extremely bad behaviour.  The phrase is one of the most prevalent in the programme.

Mint – this is a good thing, it pleases me greatly. 

Canny – the phrase has two primary uses, as “quite”, ie “That’s canny good” or “nice”, “This kebab is canny, alright”.  In most cases the stars are not referring to the adjective meaning careful, cautious or prudent.

Radge – completely out of control, in a bad way.  This person or thing should be avoided at all costs.

Do Ye Run Man, Do Ye Nash – quick, let’s get away!  The police/ large men/ angry women/ the bus (is) are coming.

Hadgy Pash – Look, I think it’s about time you calmed down.

Wey-Aye Man – yes, I agree

Alreet – hello, how are you?

Gan Doon the Toon – shall we have a drink now, perhaps something alcoholic?

Howay Man – oh, that’s good or come on! I’m quite excited.

Pet – affectionate term for a person.  “Auf Wiedersehen Pet.”

Marra – a friend or associate.  A mate.

Tash on – heavy petting or kissing of the French variety.  Tashin’ may occur during or after a mortal night out.

Hoy – to throw something.  “I hoyed her in the pool.” 

Game – I’m very much enthused by this idea.  I’m “up for it“.

Pie off –  dismiss.  A girl may pie off a male suitor’s advances.

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This is a work in progress.  Do you have any Geordie Shore favourites to add to the list?  If so, leave them in the comments below…