IF PETE'S BEEN ON A "GREAT JOURNEY" THEN HE'S HAD HIS CAR IN REVERSE, AS HE'S IN A WORSE PLACE NOW THAN WHEN HE ARRIVED.

Home time

Considering the strong feelings of homicidal revulsion that slosh around my porridge brain each time I watch Nikki Grahame play-acting, I'm rather relieved the end is nigh. As a Big Brother addict right from day 1 of BB1, I think I've finally put myself off. After 93 days, like a child let loose in a sweet shop, I've over-indulged and now I feel sick.

Was this a good Big Brother? I'm not sure. I think the pressures of keeping the storyline alive for 13 weeks required Endemol to use many suspect measures and straw-clutching devices.

I've not forgotten about Dawn "the cheat" or "lovable eccentric" Shahbaz. Or the glorification of the schoolyard bully, Grace. Or "the twist", which has dented my confidence in the validity of voting for ever.

The main memory I have of Big Brother 7 right now is the unyielding meanness and paranoia at the expense of laughter and friendship. Oh, and obviously Michael's crusty, pond-coloured chunderpants as he jumped in the swimming pool after three days of doing weights in 40-degree heat. I'll not forget that for a while, and neither will Susie.

The point of writing the BB blog was that I would watch it as a fan, same as ever, then report on my ever-fluctuating feelings. And just like you've done, I'm sure, I've made U-turns, daft assumptions and plain mistakes.

There was a time when I thought Lea was a dead cert to win and would be the next booby, giggly Diana Dors. Or maybe our own British version of Cicciolina. I thought Grace was cheery and harmless. I was convinced Shahbaz was an actor, Richard was the next Dorothy Parker, and Ash was just a dim-witted promo girl with nothing valid to offer.

I even announced once that Nikki had a small twinkle in her eye that stopped her being truly unlikeable. It's funny how things pan out. I now hold Nikki, her truly unlikeable personality, and all the producers responsible for trampling over public opinion to reinstate her, culpable of killing the show.

I still have a big soft spot for Glyn and think he's been a great housemate, although at times he's been a terrible brat. Jennie, in contrast, has never made much of an impression on me. Not when she arrived, not during her stay and I still feel blank-faced about her on finale night.

The only strong gut feeling I've managed to hold onto since day 1 is that Pete Bennett doesn't deserve this "dead-cert winner" status. Pete's not a bad person; he's nice, sweet and pulls some funny faces, but he's also the patron saint of skid marks, sulking and saying nothing important when something important needs to be said.

The fact that Pete's found his voice again in week 13 to remind people that angels want him to win £100,000, I find very icky. But then the fact that Pete's spent 13 weeks extolling the virtues of non-materialism and loving your fellow man like a stuck Levellers CD before shacking up with one of Britain's best known material girls/troublemakers is very odd, too.

If Pete's been on a "great journey" then he's had his car in reverse, as he's in a worse place now than when he arrived.

From around day 56, I had my eye on Aisleyne Horgan-Wallace as a person I thought had the qualities to win. Regardless of what anybody thinks of Ash, whether she's moody, emotional or just a "tart", the fact is, there is no other housemate who has weathered as many storms or progressed as far as Ash has during BB7.

Crucially, there is not one other housemate surviving who could have coped with everything that's been chucked at her since day 12 without escaping in hysterics via the back door. Maybe Richard, although direct attacks really do unsettle him.

I still believe Ash going back into the real house in her addled, sobbing state was one of the lowest moments in reality-TV history ever

Ash arrived at a disadvantage on day 12, with the cliques in full swing, with only Sam, a clingy transsexual, as her true contemporary. Sam was no use whatsoever as a support for Ash - in fact she was a further emotional leech.

Within minutes, Grace, Sezer and Mikey had Ash carved up as a "common slag" who "looks like ET". Their instant hatred of Ash, based on her looks and her class, couldn't have been more blatant. It was sink or swim for Ash from the very start. Ash swam.

She took on Sezer (where everyone else had failed), put on her best Elsie Tanner face, toughened her "ghetto girl" armour and fronted them all out. It sent the Plastics ballistic.

I remember putting on the live feed on day 13 and watching Ash, not cowering in the bedroom, but sitting bold as brass on the sofa in a skimpy mini-dress, smoking a fag and looking like Lily Savage on a day off, laughing heartily with Lea. "Good for you, lass," I thought. Weeks of upset ensued as the women squabbled and bickered.

When Golden Girl Susie arrived, I respected Ash for upholding the clearly risible, archaic view that an older woman's maturity, experience and wisdom is something worthy of respect. Imagine that?!

Sadly, 43-year-old Susie's treatment at the hands of all the other younger women, like Nikki and Grace, was nothing short of disgusting. I hope it haunts them in later years when their "sell-by date" looms closer.

When Grace and Nikki stole Susie's belongings and did their war dance, Ash burst into tears with frustration. When Grace chucked water in Susie's face on eviction night, Ash was the only person to shout forcefully at Grace in the heat of the incident. And she didn't accompany Grace to the door to give her a cheery goodbye like everyone else.

Ash then had to endure being called an "arse-licking slag" by Mikey for a further week. To date, Ash is the only person I have ever seen take Grace to task over the water incident. Richard was a pure letdown. All that Ash has gleaned from any of this is a reputation as a troublemaker.

I like the way Ash has a variety of silly laughs - each one more stupid than the last one - from amused walrus to asthmatic hyena. I like the way she sings like Hilda Ogden when she's doing the housework.

I like the way that she actually gets stuck in and does the housework, which is more than can be said for the rest of the dirty, lazy bunch who think skid marks and pubic hairs remove themselves.

I like the way she has a worse bad-boyfriend history than me. I like the way that every time you think she should be prime minister, she does something stupid and flawed like snogging Nikki during Spin the Bottle. Ash, why?!

I admire the way Ash eventually said to Lea what every single person in Britain thought about Lea's creepy, suffocating hold on Pete. "You got a problem with me, Ash?" Lea quacked in front of the whole bedroom on day 43. Ash looked at her for a moment, then said: "Yeah, I have got a problem with you. I'm sick of you manipulating people in here and using emotional blackmail to get what you want."

Lea was gobsmacked. A few days later, after three weeks of enduring Nikki's tiresome, selfish tantrums, Ash was the very first person to speak up and say something. She only said one word, mind: "Boring."

In both these instances, total carnage ensued. I've never seen anyone stand up to Nikki since. Ash has been painted for evermore as a "bully" and a "stirrer", vilified in every tabloid and spin-off show and presented as the "unpopular BB7 bitch". It's all fabulously, gorgeously ironic.

Personally, rather than being a bitch, I actually think Ash is a vision of restraint. By day 43, if either Lea or Nikki had said: "Got a problem with me?" I would have still been talking them expressively through "my problems" as the policewomen handcuffed me, tied my feet together and carried me to the riot van.

Every eviction night people have turned up to scream "Get Ash out!" during Davina's links. That must have been a nice feeling keeping Ash warm in bed for 80 nights. Eventually, Ash was "evicted". She reached the top of the stairs, her legs buckling under her, then was brought back in and placed in a secret house with five new housemates whom she was forced to evict one by one.

I still believe Ash going back into the real house one week later in her addled, sobbing state was one of the lowest moments in reality-TV history ever. She bounced back, of course - she always does. What a bloody summer this girl has had.

Obviously, since then, we've enjoyed Spiral's unwanted advances ("Ash is a prikkktease!" squealed the Trashleen hatterz), the machiavellian test-result saga, the audition-VT drama. We've enjoyed Grace Adams-Short being brought back into the house purposefully to take Ash on. To Ash's credit here, she held her own during the circus show and admonished Grace again about attacking Susie.

Meanwhile, Pete hid by the urinals pretending to have found something extra fascinating in his groin region, which needed 21 minutes of examination. So brave.

Maybe Pete had found another celestial message down there telling him he was God's chosen winner. Because, let's face it, if Pete takes the prize tonight, it will certainly feel like a load of old balls.

Are you voting? Who for? Mail me on grace.dent@bbc.co.uk.

PS - Pop back on Monday to read my final BB blog. Plus, from next Friday, I'll be writing a brand-new TV column. More details to follow.