Big Brother Blog by Grace Dent - Only on Radio Times

Day 82

The masses are revolting

Posted on TUE 8 AUG, 12:55PM

The statement from Big Brother's spokesperson about "the twist" wasn't exactly contrite:

"It's a record-breaking vote," they said, "We have never had a bigger response in this time period. People love a storm, but the truth is this appears to be one of our better moments."

Big Brother didn't say exactly how many ecstatic viewers were scrambling back to their phones to sling even more cash in Endemol's direction, but the tone of the statement seemed to say: "Look, bloody tons of them, right? We're all good." Weirdly, there was no direct mention of the 1,196 (and counting) complaints to media regulator Ofcom.

Reportedly, the Ofcom complaints were from viewers who've taken part in the ten-week, 50p-per-text competition, only to discover that the small print makes it possible for the competition organisers to reinstate evicted housemates to win.

Personally, I don't blame people for being bloody angry. If 5.9 million viewers tuned in on week eight to watch Nikki being evicted; it's fair to assume that the majority of people who spent their 50p voting her out did so to remove her from their screens for good and not have her take part in finale night.

Bringing back Nikki - and I'll focus on Nikki as that's where the money lies - is a potentially wildly lucrative affair.

OK, tonight's poll money is going to charity, but from then until 18 August, I assume that the public are back to donating most of the cost of the vote to Endemol. If just under 6.5 million people voted for baddie Jason v goodie Nadia on BB5's finale night, then a Nikki v Pete, Glyn or Ash on BB7 promises to be even more sensational.

Let's face it, whoever Nikki battles, viewers will be spending more money. It's safe to say that with Nikki in the finale, someone important's Tuscan villa could soon very well be getting a spangly new pool cabana.

But what can the "little person" feeling conned out of cash do anyway, I wonder? The legal case here is highly complex, plus the continuing nightly Big Brother circus is hugely distracting. And any viewer who makes a big song and dance about feeling diddled will just look like a colossal nutter anyhow.

The ingenious thing about pumping Big Brother into normal, working class people's homes, in a primetime slot for 82 nights, employing every TV editing method known to man to make the programme more than just a game show and more akin to a lifestyle choice, is that when things get muddy, there's no shortage of people who'll just smirk at the silly viewers and bray: "Oh, get a life."

Obviously, if it was Question Time that had held a rolling ten-week, 50p-per-text competition, then announced that the rules weren't as they perhaps appeared, but cheers for the cash anyhow and could you send some more, it would quickly become one stinking, chattering classes' media outcry that would never, ever die.

Sadly, I don't think this will happen with Big Brother. People will forgive, even if they won't forget.

Grace should have been dispensed with in the same way as Dawn. Obviously, this was back when viewers thought there were rules

Reinstating Nikki Grahame will be doubly fortunate for Channel 4 as she's already been allotted a reality TV show called Princess Nikki. Apparently, the show will follow Nikki as she attempts to do various secretarial and menial jobs with head-banging consequences.

It sounds a lot like Paris Hilton's The Simple Life, but instead of watching a multi-million-pound heiress sneering at rednecks, this will centre on a little middle class girl from Northwood basically throwing quite disturbing tantrums.

Hopefully for Channel 4, Nikki can re-create those legendary Big Brother tantrums that we enjoyed over bottled water, speckled bananas and the one where her MP3 player didn't work. Tantrums where Nikki howled, screamed, shouted, bit and swore and her eyes shrivelled and she sobbed until her little face was red raw with hot tears.

One of my biggest dilemmas with Nikki is that when she first began throwing these huge, controlling tantrums, I was very, very brutal about her. Quickly, hundreds of upset emails began arriving from people telling me about her long battle with extreme eating disorders. They were from people who knew very well about eating disorders. These people weren't happy with me taking the mick out of Nikki's tantrums.

Speaking candidly on Richard & Judy just weeks ago, Nikki said that she was first hospitalised for anorexia aged eight. Nikki then said she'd been "in and out of places all of her life". She told us that her last admission was aged 18. Obviously, this was all in the past. Nikki wanted us to know that she was now "living a normal, happy life".

I really, truly hope that Nikki Grahame is living a "normal, happy life" and that this gives the TV producers all the footage they require; because, when she comes back tonight there are a lot of people expecting some seriously jaw-dropping hysterics.

The character I have real misgivings about letting back on screen is Grace Adams-Short. During the first weeks that Grace arrived on Big Brother, she gave me such an unpleasant, bilious reminder of the female bullies at my old school in the 80s, I found watching her mesmerisingly bleak.

I began to find it increasingly bizarre that while GMTV, Richard & Judy and This Morning were brimming with these hand-wringing reports filled with tearful parents of kids who won't set foot in school, here we were relishing Grace's twisted behaviour: calling other women "slags", "sluts", "whores", "ugly, fat cows" and "thunder thighs", and at one point leading a bizarre tribal war dance around Susie, stealing her belongings, screaming "beauty and the beast" in her face and talking openly about beating the woman up. I suppose it was all good TV, though. It's just pantomime after all, isn't it?

But a line was crossed for me on Grace's eviction night, when she threw water in Susie's face as she left. The plain fact is that whether Grace chucked water, glitter or sulphuric acid, she chucked it in a deliberate, aggressive manner with the intention of humiliating another person in front of upwards of five million people.

Grace did this while she was still inside the Big Brother house. According to the game rules, Grace should have been dispensed with in the same way as Dawn. Obviously, this was back when viewers thought there were rules.

In Grace's interview with Davina she was remorseless about her behaviour. In the Big Brother spin-off shows she was literally applauded. Honestly, literally applauded. Apparently Grace was a "brilliant housemate". There was never any attempt to explain to kids that acting like Grace isn't actually very funny at all, it's intimidating and harmful.

So much gubbins is spoken about "bullying" these days that the issue, rather than being any clearer, just gets murkier. People like Jodie Marsh can chuck their weight around all day on Celebrity Big Brother, then hide behind the accusation of being bullied the moment anyone so much as coughs "shut up" behind a hand. None of this is particularly helpful for the kids whose lives are really being made a daily living misery by some little pinch-faced school tyrant.

So, anyway, ignore me, let's bring Grace back and enjoy some more of her antics. They can all do whatever they want, I'm not spending any more money voting any of them to go bloody anywhere.

Grace Dent has left the building: leave messages on grace.dent@bbc.co.uk.

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Who does Grace think will make it to the bitter end of Big Brother? Find out her fantasy finalists in the new issue of Radio Times magazine, on sale now.