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Relocation, Relocation

Relocation, Relocation presenters Phil Spencer and Kirstie Allsopp
  • Posted at 3:45pm
  • 22 January 2009
  • by AlisonGraham-RT
  • 13 comments

I used to like Relocation, Relocation, but it's now reduced me to a gibbering ninny, leaving me whimpering on my sofa or screaming with my fingers in my ears.

This is nothing to do with presenters Kirstie Allsopp and Phil Spencer, who I think are admirable and who obviously know their stuff - it's the property hunters themselves.

The recent first episode of the new series was a corker. I've blotted out most of the details, I think due to mental self-preservation (see first paragraph), but I do recall that it featured a spectacularly annoying woman.

She was terribly jaunty and laughed a lot, which I think we were meant to find endearing and just a little bit kooky, but which really made me want to fling a bucket of sand at her.

I knew she was trouble right from the start because neither she nor her husband really knew what they wanted. And you can always tell when Relocation, Relocation participants are serious, because they are focused and determined. Which this pair were not.

But what led me to run from the sitting room, sobbing with impotent fury, was when she ran her hands down the living-room wall of a perfectly lovely house before declaring she couldn't possibly live here because the walls weren't smooth. Yes, honestly.

The couple were shown a succession of absolutely delightful houses but, no, none of them would do, for reasons that seemed to change with every passing minute. At one point Annoying Woman declared she wanted to live in a new build. She and her husband ended up buying a derelict bungalow. I can say no more, or I will start to cry.

Last week's (14 January) couple were just as irritating, particularly again, it shames me to say, the female half of the partnership who - yes, you've guessed it - rejected, once more, a succession of nice houses for silly reasons. I think she probably even had a little cry at one point, the height of self-indulgence. It's a house, not a national tragedy. They didn't buy anything.

Maybe Relocation, Relocation's time is up. Not because of the credit crunch but because the people taking part, by and large, simply don't or won't fit the show's brief, ie they don't buy anything, or buy something that makes no sense (see derelict bungalow).

Then there's the endless moaning - the road's too busy, the neighbours are too close, the kitchen's not big enough (another bugbear, why the national obsession with big kitchens? What are you doing in there, hosting Viennese balls?).

**

Alison Graham is TV editor of Radio Times - read her column in the latest issue of Radio Times magazine, on sale now.

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Comments

  • Posted on 19 April 2009
  • at 4:29pm
  • by cat

I suppose there as many opinions as there people. We can't all have the same taste or opinion. We just have to be more understandable about others. Somethimes house may be perfect, but doen't feel right and there is nothing you can do about it.

  • Posted on 11 March 2009
  • at 11:37am
  • by Sam

'I couldn't live with this kitchen' is a frequent comment of a stupid, spoilt and selfish buyer, standing in a new or perfectly sound kitchen!!!

Poor darlings - I hope the recession has caught up with them all and swiped away their pretentiousness. Get a life!

Kirsty & Phil are brilliant.

  • Posted on 25 February 2009
  • at 6:32pm
  • by suze

I can't believe people are being horrible to the house choosers! How many homes did you look at before you decided on yours? When I moved, I saw about 60 propertises, and I'm only renting. Why on earth would someone select a house costing at least £200k from a bunch of 3? I'd look at more handbags or sofas than that. A house is home after all.

  • Posted on 17 February 2009
  • at 6:34pm
  • by Isla

I disagree, I really enjoy seeing people trying to make up their minds what they really want to buy. What I enjoyed the most was when Kirstie was pregnant, she was really funny, she had no patience with their fickleness and was very amusing with her comments. She should be pregnant all the time makes the programme very entertaining!

  • Posted on 12 February 2009
  • at 1:06pm
  • by Linda

Couldn't agree with Alison's comments more. But please let's keep the programme because I adore Kirstie and Phil as they are a delight: charming, knowledgeable and immense fun. I also love drooling over properties I can't afford. Another annoying thing, how come all those obnoxious property seeking folk are so very rich? There must be a connection. Would love to see some of the riper outtakes from this programme …

  • Posted on 30 January 2009
  • at 2:32am
  • by Jackie

Would it be possible for Phil and Kirstie to help Gordon Brown relocate to somewhere in the North Sea?

  • Posted on 29 January 2009
  • at 1:51pm
  • by Gary

Cursty & Phill make it look easy, but I think every relocation company knows this episode highlighted the reality of our business, but it's still a great profession!

  • Posted on 29 January 2009
  • at 11:29am
  • by tvaddict

I wrote a review of RR after the first program on my blog, which you can read here if interested: http://thetvdaily.blogspot.com/2009/01/repossession-repossession.html I must admit, I stopped watching last night because -as others have said - the potential purchasers are just becoming more and more annoying!!! To the point where the prog is unwatchable! The annoying woman on the first episode was horrible, but I still found it rather funny. Week after week of the same becomes too much!I do think the zeitgeist moment for property porn is over though, thanks in part to the current climate.

  • Posted on 29 January 2009
  • at 10:21am
  • by Edward

I think this and programmes like this are living on borrowed time.Remember Changing Rooms and Ground Force?,once so popular,now a distant memory.The economic downturn will sweep property porn from our screens and replace them with infinite versions of Dinner Party shows.

  • Posted on 28 January 2009
  • at 12:14pm
  • by frogg

I find the presenters georgous and only watch for them

  • Posted on 23 January 2009
  • at 5:16pm
  • by Jason

The programme you refer to is the first I have been unable to finish watching - what made me switch off was them arriving in a perfectly nice looking area and describing it as 'grim'!

I used to be able to tolerate these idiots but after the best part of a year and a half trying to shift a house which was rejected time and time again for similarly flimsy reasons I just can't watch them any more!

  • Posted on 23 January 2009
  • at 1:51pm
  • by sujee

I absolutely agree with Alison - I watched the first episode as the wife become more self obsessed with ever changing criteria... I shouted at the television when watching this because I cannot believe that Kirsty did not planted a shovel in someone's head!!

  • Posted on 22 January 2009
  • at 5:58pm
  • by Oliverdog

I could have written this spot-on review myself. I had that sinking feeling when 14 January male consistently referred to his disintegrating mortgage arrangements as "the product" - poor Kirsty seemed to be coming apart at the seams by the end of this sorry episode.

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