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Big Brother: week nine

Big Brother contestant Nicole
  • Posted at 5:31pm
  • 07 August 2008
  • by PaulJones-RT

Romance 3/5

Rex's girlfriend Nicole is the new face in hell, and the way he's been pining after her up until now, you'd think it would have been a happy reunion. But no. As Mikey said, "I don't honestly know what would make Rex happy."

Since Nicole arrived, Rex has gone from soppy hand-holding across the divide, and an obsession with what Nicole is thinking, to directing paranoid abuse at her. Yep, that's one romance that is definitely on the rocks. Meanwhile, though, another is blossoming. Well, sort of…

Earlier in the week Darnell experienced "an embarrassing moment, followed by a series of more embarrassing moments" when he leapt into Sara's bed and she leapt straight out. And last night, while they were locked in a mostly platonic embrace, Darnell decided to smother her backside in talcum powder. The strangled noise he made as he watched her slap her arse and raise a cloud of talc into the air made it clear what he was thinking. "Smoking bum-bum!" observed Kat. Indeed.

Despite her protestations, Sara knows she's attractive and she knows she's leading Darnell on. But right now they're my two favourite housemates and for the most part I'm loving their relationship, which is both sweet and funny (take their improvised Spam advert, for example). No matter who does or does not fancy whom, I'm happy to believe there's a genuine connection between them, and some real warmth.

Tasks 2/5

Christmas came early for the housemates from hell, who were told they'd have to belch and gag their way through 300 brussels sprouts if they wanted to nominate. It wasn't long before Kat - "they smew of faaart!" - and Nicole - "If it was any other food I think I'd be OK…" - threw in the towel. But heroic Mikey kept on going (and with all those sprouts inside him I suspect he'll keep on going for some time to come).

So we were treated to the delightful spectacle of Mikey chewing up and spitting out sprouts into a bucket (apparently, his plan was to mix them into a paste using tea and then eat them for a second time. I wouldn't be surprised if we see that recipe on Hugh Fearnley-Whittingstall's next programme, as an accompaniment to his pigs' nostrils stuffed with duck feet). And finally, when it all became too much even for Mikey, what did he do? He went into the garden and dumped the bucket of semi-masticated veg over his own head.

So the question is: is Mikey a) going mad b) making a radical statement about Big Brother's treatment of the housemates c) just disgusting? You decide…

LisaWatch 3/5

Lisa's latest throwaway remark about her past was that she'd once regularly toured with rock bands such as 10cc. Is Lisa's belief in reincarnation based on first-hand experience? Because I don't see how she's crammed all this stuff into one life. It's either that or she's a time traveller and has been adventuring through history, with BB her latest "must-have" experience.

I bet if you know where to look you can dig out a sepia-tinged group photo from the American West, with Lisa just visible in the background.

Next week, Lisa's adventures in the court of Louis XIV…

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