Radio Times

I am a man. I have a car. It has four wheels and I quite like driving it. But, honestly, what else do you need to know? They go. Some faster than others. They come in different colours. Mine's blue and has got a CD player. They're also quite expensive. That's enough information, surely?

It would be altogether too easy and too obvious to devote the bulk of this piece to a character assassination of Jeremy Clarkson. But, hey, what's wrong with easy and obvious? The man's a prig, a smug boor who sports a ludicrous haircut and has an unfeasibly high opinion of himself. And that's just for starters.

The real wonder of Top Gear is how three unreconstructed schoolboys have persuaded the BBC to let them indulge their puerile fantasies for so long. This is nothing more than playground humour, riddled with clichés and pointless hyperbole, delivered in a grating, facetious drone.

It's all so irredeemably male. With inane and laboured analogies, each banal sentence they utter is littered with sexual connotations and lame innuendo, frequently misogynistic. At least the Stig has the good grace to remain silent and faceless.

Unbelievably there have been ten series of this drivel. Once you've seen one programme you've seen them all: they're indistinguishable. TV as wallpaper, now interminably repeated on bloke's TV.

Each episode features a new car its audience drool over but could never afford: they may feature different cars each time but the song remains the same. They also have ludicrous challenges that arguably seem to be designed more to provide an opportunity for foreign travel than genuinely test the engineering of the car. They must have a huge budget to waste.

And then, of course, there is "Star in a Reasonably Priced Car", in which celebrities check out their own testosterone levels. You can understand why Gordon Ramsay, Simon Cowell and Jimmy Carr are game for a spot of self-promotion but what on earth has induced people of the stature of Helen Mirren and Michael Gambon to participate in this garbage?

This is television for the sad and mindless - everything you hate about blokes and then some. You can see them in the gormless studio audience standing around uselessly, fawning over each presenter's pathetic pronouncements, laughing to order as though drugged or hypnotised. These are people who get seriously turned on by all that talk of torque, understeer, traction control. This is nothing other than car pornography. I mean, just how fascinating are endless shots of cars driving along motorways?

This is a show that promotes dangerous driving and the worst kind of blokishness. It is advertising masquerading as programming. And in these ecologically minded times is it not irresponsible of the BBC to endorse a gas-guzzling sub-culture that glories in its own enormous carbon footprint?

Frankly, I would rather poke needles in my eyes than ever have to watch it again. 0 to 60 minutes and on to oblivion at the push of the remote switch.

Why is everyone saying things like "If you don't like it, don't watch it", when your clearly reading an article you don't like, and then commenting on it.

If you don't like it, don't carry on reading it? :)

Mr Humphreys, you have just called 385 million people 'sad and mindless'.

AHHHHHHHHHH how can anybody write such rubbish. top gear is the greatest show ever!!!!!!!!!

clarkson for PM

So what form of televisual splendour does SIMON HUMHREYS-RT actually find acceptable. Heartbeat?

I have a video of Top Gear and some needles. I'm sure that your ridiculous cliche of a 'conclusion' would not withstand the test.

Great show, shame that all three presenters have very unfortunate hair styles !

I don't like cars. I don't like shows about cars but Top Gear has little to do with cars. Its just three blokes being big kids nothing more and highly entertainint it is to. I would much rather this than god forbid another "reality" show.

I am an 18 year old female student, and at first sight of this article's title was, I confess, slightly incensed, being a lover and watcher of Top Gear.

Upon reading the wreaths of indignant comments posted in response, I was like-minded in expressing my concern and distaste for this very harsh and pretentious opinion of a widely enjoyed entertainment show, and fully prepared to say my part.

After reading more and more comments though, and being slowly worn down by the repetition of the same arguments mirrored down the page, I found myself wondering why I cared so much.

No one agrees on everything, everyone disgrees on something. It is a TV programme. Can't everyone calm down and let it be? Surely there are more severe issues in our modern and broken world then this.

I can't believe the people that are gobbing off about how stupid and mindless the viewers of Top Gear are. What's the weather like up there on your pedestal? Top Gear is a show that is designed to be entertaining, fun and exciting. It fulfils this criteria perfectly. It's not supposed to be about car financing, petrol prices, global warming or any other stuff that The Times reports on. It is a breath of fresh air on an otherwise bland Sunday night. If you don't like it, and find it that it excites you so much you have to change your incontinence pants watch the Antiques Road Show instead.

Your kidding, you hate top gear?

there seems to be alot of good progs gettin attacked here. get someone with sense to write about what they hate please.

this article is a load of rubbish, top gear is a hugely loved and enjoyed programme nationwide, just because you dont get what youd like (which is pobably stock market boards flashing on the screen every 5 seconds) dosent mean everyone else isnt

As for the comment from the American, did you go to school, if so was grammar optional?????

Jeremy Clarkson isn't funny - and now it looks as if he isn't man enough to apologise either.

In a world of Political Correctness Top Gear is a welcome relief of ENTERTAINMENT. Obviously its not to everyone's taste (an interest in cars helps) but with 7 million viewers in the UK and over 380 million worldwide alot of people do not agree with the writer of this article. Clarkson and Hammond testing 200-300 thousand pound sports cars is what the public want to see. We want to see what the cars we can only image owning can do not just seeing them static from 3 foot away at a car show. Long live Top Gear!

f**k top gear, in one of there show's they said don't go to America, i'm American

The reason I stopped buying Fast Lane magazine in the late eighties was even then I disliked Clarksons attitude towards anyone who didn't share his rather unpleasant political views and while I still love cars and am unlikely to be able to afford even a second hand version of my ideal car I still twenty years later find the man offensive. I admit I do enjoy Hammonds enthusiasm and Mays knowledge good to watch and I also understand the role Clarkson plays in this triumvarate he does set my teeth on edge, his denial of the effects of climate change or more likely the attitude that "I won't be around so why should I care" is distressing and downright irresponsible. I have seen several programmes where all three have driven dangerously on public roads and do think they set a poor example in certain cases, in particular to the Max Power generation I have seen too many of these kids badly injured or killed because of foolish driving to condone that sort of example. All that said I do enjoy the programme generally apart from throwing things at the telly when Clarkson comes out with some of his more inane comments. Remember it is not speed that kills, it is innappropiate speed that kills you, others and deprives people of a son, daughter, father or mother.

Although I am exceedingly tempted to use this space to swear violently at you, Mr. Humphreys, I shall resist. You are in no position to comment on other peoples opinions. Would you like it if I wrote a blog saying I thought you were a useless reviewer, with less talent then a hedge with a pen sticking out? No? Then don't attack other people's hobbies and interests.

If you don't like top gear you are a girl... or a man wearing a dress...............

I think you shot yourself in the foot when you said, "But, hey, what's wrong with easy and obvious?"

Its called ENTERTAINMENT!!!! You miserable man. Top gear is awesome, and has done things which no one has ever bothered to do,, like venture to the north pole in a car.

I have a suggestion for you... If you don't like it don't watch it.

I also find it quite rude that you keep referring to it as a blokes tv show, I'm sorry but I (and alot of other FEMALE friends) watch the show because we also love cars. It's not just men who take an interest in cars. As for being immature, I have to say that whinging about something you don't like ON THE INTERNET is so pre-teen it it almost hurts.

I'll tell you what I'll personally poke your eyes out for you if you like?

Oh, dear. Aunty Beeb shepherding another conked out old crock on and on, way past its sell-by date. Talk about throwing good money after bad. Series twelve, and it looks like a foray to the Far East. I mean, how much of our licence fee did that cost? Still, there's about as much chance of Clarkson getting the boot as their is of...errr...well, Jonathan Ross. Come to think of it, he's probably the only person working for the Beeb on a similar salary. As Car magazine said of the MG Midget in it's 1978 review, "Oh death, where is thy sting?"

3 sad b******ds driving their sexual extensions. It's only a matter of time before they kill themselves. Just a surprise its not happened yet

"Frankly, I would rather poke needles in my eyes than ever have to watch it again."

But I bet you will.

if you don't like it then don't watch it. simple problem simple solution. i am an absolutely huge fan because of the charm and wit of the program with the challenges getting more and more ludicrous and entertaining.

Simon,

Let me know if you would like me to provide the needles!

I don't like strictly come dancing or coronation street or eastenders but i don't bang on a bout it.

If you don't like a program don't watch it, there are plenty of other channels to choose from, simply.

I like the footballing Aygos and the attempts by celebs to test their skills, but not car races on public roads at excess speeds and without sleep in expensive cars we mere mortals can only dream of. It glorifies both bad driving and excessiveness. And that stunt to the North Pole was just appalling.

But isn't it great that someone can be so politically incorrect and get away with it for so long (well one of them only just...). Or is a Ross moment lurking round the next bend?

Mafioso - I'm sorry. I was about to write a scathing reply to your posting. But now I read it again the irony has shone through. Brilliant! The bit about how Top Gear encourages poor driving and how the stunts will have a detrimental effect on our society. Then the bit about how YOU object to "Top Gear" as you are a licence payer(like everyone else in this country) - feigned arrogance of the highest calibre. And your closing masterpiece about a health warning because whilst you're not stupid many obviously are - quite phenomenal. Wish I could have written something like that. Thank you for brightening my gloomy day.

Reading down the comments i've seen people who hate the show label those that like the show 'sad and mindless', 'idiots', 'immature', 'deluded' and 'stupid' and that's without reading all the way to the bottom of the page.

I find this incredible and utterly offensive. My girlfriend has a different taste in music to me but you don't find me insulting her because of this. My parents go to the opera which I personally find boring yet I don't insult them because of it. This is because I respect people's choices and interets.

Go ahead, criticise the show as much as you want, everyone is free to have an opinion, but how dare you make a general assumption about the person I am because of the TV show that I watch.

The whole popularity of Top Gear is based on its ability to engage with pure, natural, uninhibited masculinity.

That's right.. it is NATURAL. We are MEN. Women like MEN, not 'guys' afraid/socially conditioned to surpress desires or testosterone fueled urges.

Its no surprise that Top Gear has an enormous cult following, as it engages with masculinity, which, believe it or not, is something that 50% of the population is should, in theory, be able to relate to. Pompous p***ks who look down upon it are the sort of stiff, inhibited people who feel awkward outside of their narrow comfort zones and feel nervous talking to attractive members of the opposite sex. Losers. This last bit is very true, do not ignore it.

The whole popularity of Top Gear is based on its ability to engage with pure, natural, uninhibited masculinity.

That's right.. it is NATURAL. We are MEN. Women like MEN, not 'guys' afraid/socially conditioned to surpress desires or testosterone fueled urges.

Its no surprise that Top Gear has an enormous cult following, as it engages with masculinity, which, believe it or not, is something that 50% of the population is should, in theory, be able to relate to. Pompous p***ks who look down upon it are the sort of stiff people who feel awkward outside of their narrow comfort zones and feel nervous talking to attractive members of the opposite sex. Losers

I cannot believe how childish and irresponsible this programme has become. I am aware of the programme's popularity but surely,the antics(and I sincerely mean "antics")of Jeremy Clarkson and his colleagues have nothing to do with careful and serious driving but more to do with taking part in dangerous stunts purely for the audience's and viewers' entertainment.

Of course,none of these stunts take place on general roads and motorways but it can only encourage the many careless and selfish drivers who are already causing concern on today's roads.

The "blokish" and extremely idiotic stunts Clarkson and his mates promote can only have a detrimental effect in today's society.

I am sick to death of being told by the BBC and viewers that if you don't like it,don't watch it! That is a facetious and completely irrelevant comment to make. I am a licence fee payer and strongly object to this sort of rubbish on TV.

At the very least,a comment or banner at the beginning and end of each programme warning drivers against the danger of recreating these stunts is necessary......yes,some of us are not stupid but neither do we want to be entertained by the brainless antics of Clarkson and cronies.

Top Gear is just for 'men' who think they know about cars but can't tell their a*se from their elbow. Good 'entertainment' but that is all. It's so fake that it is actually cringworthy.

Old half hour Top Gear on a Thursday...how I miss you!

The thing is thats what makes top gear. i love it and so do alot of other people.

Simon, how sad is it that you wasted time that you will never EVER get back to write a load of crap about how much you dislike something! I hate Desperate Housewives, luckily my TV comes with a button that magically allows me to change to another channel. It's amazing, try it sometime. Oh, as for your sweeping generalisation about Top Gear viewers......I'm a teacher with an NVQ, HND and a BSc, don't pigeon-hole viewers as 'sad and mindless' because the show is not to your taste. I could do the same with you but, what's the point? After all, doing such a thing would be pathetic and immature.

The amusing thing about this Blog is that most of the replies are better written than the actual Blog.

The real tragedy is not the show itself but that so many people seem to find this kind of thing worth arguing over. If you don't like it, turn it off - that's what I do.

The fact that so many like it anyway would seem to suggest that it's here to stay.

OK, cards on the table, I don't like it. On the occasions that my remote-control hand is sleeping, or I'm in somebody else's house and I catch myself watching a bit of TG, I find it offensive, narrow minded, very badly informed and of practically no social use whatsoever, but I'm afraid to say I feel the same way about a long list of current TV programmes. TG is symptomatic of the current zeitgeist that promotes an attitude now called 'provocative' but previously known as 'in-your-face'. These are not high-brow arguments. I cite Big Brother (and almost all other so-called 'reality' TV' programmes). TG is one of the reasons I try not to watch very much TV at all. I would like to be either entertained or informed and this does neither. So what exactly DOES it do?

Well, I'm the sort of person who believes that if a Gentleman's Club wishes to bar female members they must be allowed to do so if only because this would serve to separate these narrow minded men from the women they so clearly despise. And yes I know this argument fails to stand up when applied to something like the racist banning of ethnic minorities from Golf clubs etc. My point is that like-minded people should be allowed to congregate and perform their weird rituals in peace as long as it doesn't affect anyone else.

That's where I find TG to be sadly lacking because it very clearly promotes a self-interested attitude in drivers that clashes with the attitudes of cyclists, pedestrians and many other road-users or those of an ecological bent. In these troubled times it doesn't appear to be easy to justify its existence. If these people were all doing it on their own time I wouldn't care but it's prime time TV and the taxpayers are footing the bill.

Now, back to the Gentleman's Club: Others would have you believe that inclusiveness is the way forward and it is necessary to educate these men and allow the women in so that a more egalitarian existence can be allowed to take root.

In Top Gear? You're having a laugh. It would be chaos.

The crucial point to remember is that there is NO MIDDLE GROUND. For the most part I choose not to involve myself in arguments of this kind. I prefer there to be some kind of a chance of agreement if only to disagree. Top Gear, unfortunately, seems to be designed in a deliberately antagonistic way to appeal to certain kinds of people who will then defend it against 'attacks' from those who find it crass.

There are so many more important things in this world to worry about.

Simon you are pathetic! Love it or hate it, who cares about your opinon? Just don't watch it. In my opinion you fell line hook and sinker for Jeremy's obvious provocation. He is the Victor Meldrew of the car world, and good for him! I am a bloke, I believe I am respectful of the environment and my fellow man (sorry, fellow person) and I modestly hold two University Degrees,and I absolutely adore Top Gear. It is cheeky, frequently provocative, sometimes pointless, but oh so refreshing! Let us compare what is comparable... try Fifth Gear for size; how mind-numbingly boring, with its politically correct mix of the fatman, the blonde, the hasbeen racing driver... it makes me sick everytime I wtry to watch it. Top Gear is disrespectful, excessive, laced with a second degree humour which you sadly missed altogether. I feel sorry for you.... Go on driving your Eurobox, and live your tedious passion-free safe life.

I don't know who you are Simon, but I have some needles for you to poke your eyes with!

A Top Gear fan

Iop Gear is entertaining and fun. A simple principle that attracts many viewers. Go write about important issues happening in the world, you remind me why many journalists get a bad reputation. Write something worthwhile will you .... faceless people writing rubbish .... whatever the guys say on Top Gear they aren't hiding behind a laptop are they? Leave them be ... as my old mum used to say "if you can't say something nice. don't say it at all" Ten series ... makes it a winning formula in my book.

I am amazed these posts are still coming in over 6 months after the original blog. It just goes to show Top Gear's popularity, it fact it's one of the few programmes I watch on the beeb.

I find your comments on Top Gear really quite entertaining in that you seem to have completely missed the point for the show. You say that 'The real wonder of Top Gear is how three unreconstructed schoolboys have persuaded the BBC to let them indulge their puerile fantasies for so long.' This really makes me wonder whether you ever had a real childhood. Surely this is the beauty of the show - three rather likeable characters (in my opinion doing all the stuff you always wanted ) to do when you were a youngster (and, in the back of your mind, still want to do). This show is about reliving that childish curiousity in most of us, bar you evidently, and for 60 minutes providing a getaway from the harsh restraints of reality. Clarkson and his minions test the things we aren't in a position to do ourselves, whether it be pointless wonderings such as 'I wonder whether you could play a game of football using cars' or simply to drool over the car you could never afford but still love dearly.

'And then, of course, there is "Star in a Reasonably Priced Car", in which celebrities check out their own testosterone levels. You can understand why Gordon Ramsay, Simon Cowell and Jimmy Carr are game for a spot of self-promotion but what on earth has induced people of the stature of Helen Mirren and Michael Gambon to participate in this garbage?'

This comment of yours really seals my prejudice against you already. Has it never occured to you that maybe it's just a bit of fun, seeing which stars are secretly budding racing drivers and petrolheads? It appears to me you're taking this show much too seriously, and perhaps need to stop finding pleasure in being 'different' and hating one of the most loved programs on TV, and join the crowd - you know you want to. Or maybe you'd rather keep polishing your prize doorknobs and shooting evil looks at anyone that looks remotely cheerful.

God knows why RT employ you.

"I think the only person who could make the show more obviously scripted is Jimmy Carr - and that says a lot..." so you prefer watching shows that don't have a script? like big brother? even quiz shows are scripted. so what? as for Top gear my only criticism is that they keep getting facts about the congestion charge wrong. i work in the enforcement department and it gets a bit repetitive seeing people writing in saying "They said on Top Gear..."

Other than that it's a bloody enjoyable show. and for reference, i cycle to work!

I bet the comment below me was made by a fat, bald construction worker who attends the recording of Top Gear every single week without fail; All the while hoping that he may receive a shred of acknowledgement from one of the presenters…

Anyway, Top Gear is a terrible program. Not so much because of the people presenting it, but because of that fact that every single word that comes out of any of their mouths is so obviously from a script. I think the only person who could make the show more obviously scripted is Jimmy Carr - and that says a lot…

how can u possibly be so stereotypical 2 call the whole top gear audience "sad and mindless"!

u quite blantantly dont no each individual who watches this show; yet u stil feel u hav the right 2 sum up the thousands (if not millions!) of personalities in 2 words!

also, u refer 2 J.C as having "an unfeasibly high opinion of himself" while u obviously consider yourself a more inteligent person than the masses of top gear fans slightly hypocrytic dont u think?

"This is nothing more than playground humour, riddled with clichés and pointless hyperbole, delivered in a grating, facetious drone."

Sounds to me like a better fitting description of your criticism of Top Gear rather than the show itself.

i DON'T sit and watch the programme when it's on FIRST SHOWING, i find out what was on and watch the bits i'm interested in (IF any ?) AFTER ! !

I prefer Fifth Gear as it's more based around testing CARS not crashing them or racing them against SKIERS ?!?

I agree it's a bit silly drooling after a car i can never own, but, we all look at houses/holidays etc we aren't ever likely to own/go on ???

FatSadSteve.

I'm a part qualified accountant, with a degree in physics...consider myself relatively intelligent and well adjusted. I'm not particularly 'blokey', and can't stand football....however I find Top Gear to be funny and entertaining...I'd much rather watch something lighthearted than something depressing like Eastenders, or watch those clowns on Big Brother.

Do I think it's cerebral, a work of literary art? No. But it's fun to sit and watch for an hour without having to think too deeply - I do enough of that at work.

I resent being called, as a fan of the show, 'sad and mindless'. I don't normally comment on stories in this way, but quite frankly I was so offending by this work of 'journalism' that I had to respond.

Mr Humphreys - instead of criticising the work of others (for what are critics, other than vultures feeding off the creations of others? - they themselves make nothing), why don't you turn your hand to the creation of a television show? After your comments on the audience at large for Top Gear, and your expression for a preference of sticking needles in your eyes over watching it, I'm sure there would be a large audience for a programme showing you doing just that. Food for thought for the BBC, I'm sure. If you don't like something - learn how to work your remote control (this is how I manage to avoid Big Brother for the 16 weeks that it's on the airwaves)

You call the show 'irredeemably male' - I'm assuming you're a male with a name like simon, but you don't like it? but the show appeals to a sizeable chunk of men (and indeed women) - so you're basically saying you're better than them, you sound like Frasier, think you're above the uneducated masses, it's fine if you don't like it - but it's one of the biggest draws on the BBC and is a huge success internationally, fine if it's not your cup of tea, but i don't go around hating on what you like - opera or interpretive dance perhaps, you don't like? then don't watch, the rest of us will

I agree its drivel! Which is precisely the reason to watch it. It's better drivel than the other drivel on BBC and ITV.

i would rather let the bbc fund one of the best shows on tv than some of the s#*! on tv these days!

In regard to Alan below, you summed yourself up mate, wen you said you drive a 911.

TV involving very fast cars and people doing stupid things in them can be quality entertainment if done right but I think of recent they have become stale. I used to be an avid watcher but I find the whole thing a bit boring now.

I cant stand top gear too, its on now and my kids love it, but they are 11 years old.

The presenters are just too much in love with themselves to bear, its their pathetic egos that annoy me. Yes what sort of pathetic people stand for 6 hours tittering at the stupid comments. Tonight I stood it for 5 minutes before getting fed up of their stupid innuendos. Its a program for teenagers or mini cooper driving women.

I love cars, drive a 911 and know more about cars than they will ever learn, but cannot stand this anachronistic rubbish.

How can seeing an Austin Allegro trying to jump backwards over 70+ cars NOT be good tv?

Surely you must have found the Arctic special entertaining?

"This is a show that promotes dangerous driving" ? WHAT?

Mr Humphries do you wear beige ?????

Waste of time writing this blog, i admit everyone has an opinion and fair enough, but my god, to have the time to write this about what is probably at the moment one of the best shows on TV by an absolute mile is ludicrous. You need to lighten up and have a sense of humour.

I think you're missing the point of Top Gear. You might as well complain that Monty Python's version of "The Holy Grail" is historically inaccurate.

I am not a man. I do not have a car. I watch very little TV because I find the bulk of it boring, idiotic, formulaic or just obnoxious. But I love Top Gear. It makes me laugh out loud, and that is much sweeter medicine than whatever sour concoction this critic swallowed!

I think the fact that there is a 2 year waiting list to be a member of the audiance shows that the program is a hit which must mean it is going nowhere in a hurry i feel sorry for the sad mr humphreys, if you dont like a program because its not interesting to an individual then you do not watch it but mr humphreys has a good knowledge of the format which surely means he watches it so i must ask why? Do everyone a favour either stop watching or keep your thoughts to yourself because your only doing this to annoy the people who do enjoy the program.

What narrow minded twaddle.

learn the true art of arguing and a ill give you a better response!

mr taylpr, you and mr humprries should join the grumy old sad gits club.

yesh ive never herd of enyone so narrow minded. we can all make our own top gear aprecation and taylor,humpries hate club.... i wonder who will win.... i gess ill never know seeing as im one of those "idots" you refferd to except.. oh yea. im an a grade student,gifted and talented, and hugly sucessful in life, how clever are you!

I believe that your view seems, im sorry to say, incredibly narrow minded and sounds like that of what may think would come out ,only,from an exasperated wifes mouth!

not so!!

firstly, the fat they you felt the need to resort toinsulting jerimys hair ,shows from the out set that you are not ready to give this show a chance and would use even the most pointless point of argument causes you to lose any respect you may have gained for standing up for what yu believe in as you have structure your argument well but with poor points which in many ways can be applied to shows you watch not doubt. structure is the key to any sucessfull program. try looking t something u watch youll soon be predicting the out comes far more easily than on top gear.

next time if you dont wantto watch top gear why not just change the channel,im sure you can find some "mindless drivel" to watch instead of useing your time to insult an obviously hugely popular and sucessful program suitable form both sexs

im sorry, ys you give a good point, but it is also rubbbish in that you completly miss the point of what top gear is about.

as a girl many are surprised of my love of top gear but it has a good structure ,as do all shows, if u watch aprogram enough u can recgnise these similarities bettween programs, and thats why you become an avid watcher.

you dont watch a program if there is not structure or similaritie between eppisodes,because you can learn to familarize yourself,so get bored quickly give up

yes obviously alot of people would aggre that all you need to know about a ar is that it works, and so does top gear.

its great to watch these 3 men racing and being,admitabley,childish aout cars and its thereyouthfull ness which is soo enjoyable. top gear is not ment to be informative in a highly usefully way for the every day viewer,but tis program helps you leve the box and imagine which car u would want if you could affored it and it has given very uefull safety information in the past both purpsly( the safety rankin) and accidently) the caravan fire.)

surely this program should be praised for the way in withch it has such a great structer and variety , not slated for this

i you dont want to watch it then you dont have to, but please dont try and belitle it for those of us who have enjoyed it for so long,because, you are,indirectly ,insulting us as a viewer!

Why is someone whining about something reasonably worthwhile in entertaining people and giving vague ideas of what's on the market motor wise at the moment? Sure it's a bit childish at time, but we all need to have a youthful streak somewhere. The segments such as the caravan trip or the road trip around the USA were brilliant to watch, but then I do also find some of the presenters comments slightly less educated. On the whole I like it so I watch it.

If you don't like it to the degree that you want to stick needles in your eyes, then DON'T WATCH IT! I personally have many personal views on the questionable intellectual capacities of those who watch Big B(r)other and even take part in it, and can best summarise daid view as such: I don't like it so I find something better to watch. I suggest you do the same if you find Top Gear so intellectually devoid... There's so many channels to watch and the amazing innovation of the Satellite Dish or even a DVD player to keep you from watching any channel that specifically has Top gear on at the time.

Get a life, enjoy it, and watch things that you aren't so inclined to moan about than watching them anyway and then complaining that it's rubbish.

I quite enjoy it for what it is: a carefully scripted, well-rehearsed show that creates an illusion of spontaneous humour. We understand that it's a cash cow for the BBC so the guys cannot be allowed to improvise as the financial risk is too great, but we suspend out disbelief and enjoy the witty pretence anyway. The writers consistently come up with something entertaining both for their three 'characters' and also for the unvarying subject matter. You've got to admire the 'product' if nothing else.

I agree its drivel! So I don't watch it any more...

Top Gear has utterly lost the plot. If you want to see cars then Fifth Gear took off when the old Top Gear left off. He can't even drive very well. Trouble is no-one dare stand up to Mr Clarkson and his 'personality'; not that you can tell what he is about to say all the time, but you can tell what he is about to say all the time; same old, same old lugubrious delivery, yawn. I have some time for James May and no time for 'can I sound butch?' Richard Hammond'. Besides, I fancy VB-H!

Oh dear, how unbelievably sad that someone should take so much time to write about something they obviously don't like. The fact that the show has a huge fanbase is argument enough that the show is obviously entertaining to a great many and deserves it's rightful place. To try and elevate yourself above these fans of the show by showing such an elitist attitude only confirms that you are truly pompous and idiotic - moreso than the great Clarkson himself. Sure, Jeremy, Hamster and Captain Slow are all outspoken blokey blokes - but they, along with a huge number of men (AND women, might I add...) decide to make a show on a subject that ignites their passion. And we love it. Sorry to sound like a broken record, but as many have said, if you don't like it, why bother watching it? Your attempts to attract attention and downgrade the show are obviously going to be futile... do you really think you'll get all manner of people nodding along and agreeing like some party of churchill dogs when they read your blog? I'm sorry to inform you, but unless someone already hates the programme like you clearly do, you just sound like every viewer who ever wrote to points of view - spending valuable time in their lives finding fault with things they don't enjoy, instead of concentrating on and praising things they do like. Your blog has no effect on Top Gears fanbase, Mr Humphreys....

sorry im just going to totally disagree with the writer of this blog...firstly you have forgotten one crucial thing...it is not just guys who watch this! i am a girl, who watches this, as do most of my girl friends! we watch it for its funny comments, beautiful cars and because we ENJOY IT!!! does this mean we are "sad and mindless"? and "testosteroney"? and "the worst kind of blokishness"?? no it does not!

not only do we watch top gear, we go to MPH, a car show which the top gear presenters present as well because we are genuinely interested in them and not as car pornography, but because they are beautiful and it is fascinating how they make them work i think you have severely judged the show and only looked at it at face value!

i would advise you to actually watch a show before critiscising it

I could not agree more with the blogger. I used to watch Top Gear quite avidly but stopped when I couldn't tell one show from another. It's always the same: the people who are pro Top Gear reply by saying "Why don't you watch something else?" or "Why don't you just drown/kill yourself/stab yourself with needles", etc. This only serves to underline the point that the blogger has made - people who like Top Gear are idiots who probably like watching screensavers. To suggest that channel changing is the answer is to suggest that everyone should just sit at the BBC trough and eat up, regardless of quality or, more appropriately here, meaning.

For all the idiots: criticism of something one does not like does not suggest that the writer is wasting time or has little else to fill their lives with (just look at the number of replies to see that he is not alone!) To suggest that complaint is petty is like eating a bad meal and then paying the bill (see licence fee). I'm not surprised thickos would rather do this, however.

I think it's great to have a motoring TV show - lots of people buy and drive cars after all - but why does it have to be so dumbed down and samey?

Get a life Mr Humphries.

If yo dont like it don't watch it!

The fact that someone has gone to great time and trouble to create a blog knocking something they don't like clearly shows a sad individual who cannot move on with their life to do something more rewarding instead.

Unless this individual happens to be a journalist - whose main purpose is to get paid, usually by making controversial outlandish comments that attract interest.

Top Gear has never been more popular right now. That says it all really. Many times I've had tears streaming from my eyes whilst fighting for my breath and nearly died laughing watching that programme. And it also appeals to my love of supercars and technology, in this dreary world full of mundane boring salesmobiles and peoplewagons. For me, and no doubt millions of others watching it, it's entertainment at it's very finest. Long may it continue.

I used to love top gear in it's old more serious foremat.It was then much more interesting to us car buffs.The cackling audience adds nothing to the show and should be done away with too.

It seems that your attack upon top gear is borne out of an elitist attitude toward the people who are entertained by the show. You make snide and crude observations with no regard to consider why people love the show so much. Perhaps such an attack on Sex and the City would cause all manner of sexist replies. This article is no less sexist. You make cheap comments that anybody with a bee in their bonnet about Clarckson could easily have made. This is so unashamedly biased that it is worthless. Whether or not i do like the show.

It's kind of ironic how your journalistic style there seems almost Clarksian. Silly boy.

It doesn't offer a decent realm of criticism on cars, obviously. It's entertainment, otherwise it would be on the list of factual programmes on the BBC iplayer.

But the bottom line is why should I give a Hot potato coin if you don't like Top Gear. Is that really worthy criticism of television. Shouldn't you be delving throughout the channels trying to find something worthy of watching that isn't actually being seen instead of watching something over and lambasting that something with a large fanbase, one which even reaches towards Guardian reading lefty academics. If not, please lead a campaign towards ending all programmes produced by Simon Cowell.

This is an excellent blog, it's everything I feel about Top Gear. Obviously it is incredibly popular with a vast number of mindless idiots and they're all clearly shocked that anyone could dislike this rubbish.

I should add that I don't watch Top Gear but I have often had to put up with people at work reliving all of the hilarious gags and stunts that they saw on the last show. I'm sure it will continue for another decade at least. Lucky us...

The car bit's rubbish.

It's TV for idiots, and the sad thing is there are so many idiots who find this drivel entertaining.

i'm not going to bash Mr Humphreys for his opinion. Everyone's got one and his is no less valid than anyone else's. I can only express my own. I truly enjoy watching Top Gear - it has me giggling like a school boy.

As - what I would consider- a reasonably well educated Professional, I know that barring a lottery jackpot win I will probably never get the thrill of regularly driving the machinery featured on the show. Watching someone else enjoying these cars so blatantly is, whilst maybe not the next best thing, at least gets the hairs on the back of my neck standing up. Like people have said elsewhere, if you don't like it, don't watch it. If your problem is that its a waste of the license fee, well, I don't dig the horse racing but over the last few days it seems that Royal Ascot's been plastered all over the BBC news and they have even got the weather girl broadcasting from the course. The BBC is necessarily a broad church and i think it gets an undue kicking from a lot of sources. The facts are it needs to nurture its successes in order to have them subsidise the niche programming - I am no expert but i would imagine that this is why shows like Top Gear and Dr Who for example have bigger budgets and are heavily promoted worldwide.

I'd just like to congratulate the writer of this post.

Untill they show Jeremy f***ing Clarkson getting run over by his GT f***ing 40 its NOT A F***ING COMEDY!!!!

To all those who complain about the cost of Top Gear from the Licence Fee the programme more than recovers the costs to make it and is the most sold programme by BBC Worldwide.

Oo sweet jesus what planet are you living on its quite obvisous that people over rule you blog and that top gear is a very worth while show on the bbc i wud much rather watch that than any other show on the tv. J.C is practically everyones idol of a teenage boy!

I dont know why you have even botherd posting this blog at all!

I like nearly everthing about Jeremy Clarkson from his dislike of the French to his non PC approach to global warming. I also find TG very entertaing so go stick your head in a bucket of poo Simon Humpreys who ever you are.

You have summarised exactly why it is so popular! Long live Top Gear!

Guardian reading, bicycle riding, left wing academic here. Yes, interesting article. Tel you what Simon, why don't you try and think why millions of people tune into listen to laconic, clued-up and incredibly badly behaved, middle aged schoolboys playing with expensive toys.

It's because we'd all love to do it. Top Gear is fun, enormous fun and a 60 minute fantasy period for everybody who enjoys the sheer frustration and utter joy endemic to motoring. And Clarkson a prig? Have a good hard look in the mirror before coming out with statements like that. Clarkson may be opinionated, but he does a better line in self-deprecation than almost anybody else on television. He's witty, informed, clever and along with Hammond and May, fantastic company on a Sunday evening.

What else…? Oh yes, as a fan I am apparently sad and mindless? So that must also apply to Helen Mirren and Gambon and who else…well that well known dullard Rory Bremner, plus Patrick Stewart, Timothy Spall, Carol Vorderman, Joanna Lumley, Tim Rice, just to name a few other members of society's flotsam…oh yes, and Stephen Fry, of course, clearly the least intelligent, most mindless person on the box.

You're an ill-informed idiot Humphreys. If you really want to reduce a huge carbon footprint and save the world a lot of trouble, I can recommend you take a really long swim, say between Penzance and Bermuda.

I'm a woman, I have a car, I love driving it and I love this show, so much so that I actually went to see it being filmed, and yes I'm sure that there were plenty of sad and mindless people there but strangely I didn't meet any, I'm not and neither are any of the people I went with. I personally didn't do much fawning although was quite keen to get a couple of pics of the Stig and Mr Hammond and all my laughter was genuine, even after the 2nd take. I'm sure it wasn't your intent to be rude and unpleasant about the people who enjoy this programme or to unfairly stereotype us. Yes, it's puerile, some of the "tests" are obviously set up, extremely silly, and JC is regularly and spectacularly un-PC (thank goodness something is these days), but any programme that Sir Ranulph Fiennes appears on can't be all bad surely (probably one of the best "stars" ever). They manage to draw "Stars in reasonably priced cars" because they either want to plug their new book/film, get some free publicity, get paid well to do it or maybe, just maybe, they enjoy cars and the challange of beating fellow celebs on the laps. All the cars are out of my price range but at least this way I know what to buy when I make my first million!! I don't do sport, history, reality TV or soaps so please leave me something funny to watch that isn't from America!!!

The problem here is that Simon Humphreys probably owns a caravan and Clarkson may well have gone speeding past at the first opportunity in his GT-40 and Humphreys feels a little upset. Needles in eyes please Simon, at least it might shut you up.

Get stuffed... This is one of only a very few things worth watchinig on the box. It's great entertainment, well informed and about the only place you get to see a Lotus against an Apache helicopter gunship. I suppose you're one of those Gaurdian readers who'd have us all living in hermetically sealed, environmentally friendly habitats and only use a bicycle when it's absolutley necessary. Go away and give us all some peace to watch Clarkson and Co.....

Top Gear is above everything else, tongue in cheek, hence it's worldwide popularity (yes, I have seen it in places like The Philippines let alone the US). Believe me the BBC wouldn't still keep running if they couldn't make a packet selling it abroad.

As for Simon Humphrey, head up arse. That in itself makes it even more difficult to understand him as he clearly talks through the same orafice.

I can't believe that you think that. You should try sticking needles in your eyes instead then.

Starting your article with "I am a man. I have a car." Does not qualify you as an authority on this subject any more than anyone else. I know people of both sexes, people who are interested and people who couldn't care less about cars who like this program. I suspect the reason is the humour (which you obviously do not get). I can appreciate that you do not like this program, we all have different taste, but that is no reason to insult those who do. Just because you do not like it does not mean those who do are "mindless." You appear to be putting yourself on an intellectual pedestal with comments like that, one I doubt you deserve with respect to the viewers of Top Gear.

As does my fellow guest I too struggle to transcribe my own inarticulate thoughts. So all I can say is great blog! To the argument that it is the most downloadable programme in the world, could it not just be the case that the majority of the world are in fact "sad and mindless"? (never believe anyone that either begins or ends a sentence with "apparently")

I like Top Gear. I watch Top Gear. That is the thing with TV - if you like it you can watch it, and if you don't like it then DON'T WATCH it - easy when you learn how to operate your remote isn't it!

top gear - most downloaded programme in the world (apparently) - thats got to say something hasn't it ?

The blogger hits the nail on the head nearly every time for me and appears to transcribe my own inarticulate thoughts into succinct and very entertaining prose.

Do us all a favour and get rid of such TV licence-guzzling presenters. They are like cars themselves, i.e noisy, overrated, expensive to run, smelly from the rear end....in all but one respect: cars can keep going ages after a couple of pints!

And there lies the crux, the very reason why men adore, perhaps even worship, their cars. A car does not criticise or nag, it doesn't mind whether you have poor taste in music, and it puts up with the most banal of conversation without judgement. It is warm, cosy and womb-like, it has a rather phallic gear stick (whatever would Freud make of that, had he treated men and not women?) Basically it allows men to gratify all their repressed and unfulfilled wants from infancy. It even has an umbilical cord (seat belts!)

All programmes like this do for me is make me want to shove my foot through the TV screen...but sadly I am a mere girly. This must be why I don't like cars!

Well I would rather watch something like Topgear or a Picture Britain than the kind of peeping tom moron who want to watch Big Brother and all the other fly on the wall programs or all the twits who watch soaps because it is marginality a bit better than there own lives so if you don't like Topgear than switch it of as I do when Big Brother ect is on and maybe you could push of on your push bike? in the mixed belief that you are saving the planet or down to your local church talking to your imaginary friend ect

well, I think I talking him down off his perch. He's probably writing to Points of View as we speak

WHY I HATE TOP GEAR.......is the title of the article. So you think that other people are interested in why you don't like the show? I take it you write into Points of View as well then eh?The fact that Top Gear has ran for 10 series, (and just to annoy you even more, the 11th starts on the 15th of June) shows that ratings are so high that the public demands more; as they do. The show has won numerous awards over the years, and each of them was well deserved, because it keeps shows that are based around renovating houses for no reason other than to get on TV off the air; along with 'I'm a Celebrity' wherever it is that they're trying to get out of now & Big Brother (THE worst show on television). Apologies to anyone who watches relocation relocation relocation or grand designs, I'm sure they're factual programs for those who are looking to renovate their houses.I tune in every week to watch Top Gear, and it is usually the only thing I do watch because of all the rubbish on the rest of the television. The show, while it may not appeal to yourself Simon, I think merely gives people that nice feeling of "If I could afford one of those", or the laughter it gives people whenever they attempt one of the challenges, which I might remind you are ALL based on factual properties. It gives viewers something to enjoy before they have to get to work at 09:00 the following morning.The show has been criticised many times, mostly by people who put their lives into caring about the environment, with which I have no quarms. However the CO2 levels in the O-Zone have not raised by as much as these people keep telling us. Since the creation of the earth the CO2 levels have raised from 0.03% to 0.04%; remember now, that's since THE CREATION OF THE EARTH, not during the last 50 years as they keep saying!As far as the, as you say ENDLESS challenges go, there have been..............wait for it.................13. Hmmmm, I'd say that was 13, and slightly less than ENDLESS as you simply inserted into that waste of server space you call an article. Also, "many of them seem to be abroad" as you say. Actually no, there have been 4, again, less than MANY.To sum up, as I can't be bothered to argue with someone who believes that:A: They're the first person to dislike a TV show B: They're important enough that their views should be shared with the reset of the UK C: They can seem nice enough by seeming to sympathise by stating "I have a car"If you don't like the show, DON'T WATCH IT. Go back to your cave and carry on writing to points of view about niggly little things in programs, possibly "Oh, I saw someone with a cigarette in their hand on this show, I demand it be put on after the watershed".I'll await an intelligent reply stating something more worthwhile than "I dislike a TV show", and stereotyping anyone who likes driving more than you.Happy Easter!!!

Clarkson is smug with a high opinion of himself? Talk about the pot calling the kettle black. If Top Gear can't penetrate your thick fog of pretension then that's your loss. Bloke-ish, yes. Peurile, maybe. Entertaining, definitely.

I'm a latecomer to Top Gear. I've always been aware of it but never really watched it. I've read a few of JC's non motoring books and love his sense of humour. Top Gear now get's watched regularly!

1)"It's all so irredeemably male" - what about being male is irredeemable? And why do we wish to be redeemed? What is wrong with being a man? Why do you feel embarrassed about your manhood?

2)" These are people who get seriously turned on by all that talk of torque, understeer, traction control. This is nothing other than car pornography. I mean, just how fascinating are endless shots of cars driving along motorways?" - why shouldn't they like it? The viewing figures would seem to suggest that, while you personally may prefer not to watch this admittedly specialised interest piece of programming, a lot of other people do. The reason it ran into 10 series is that it's actually entertaining to some people. I would rather die than watch any of the many cooking programmes on tv, but I at least accept that many others do!

I totally disagree. I too am a man, and I have a relatively boring car, but I enjoy watching the program, partly for the car aspect, and partly as a comedy show.

There are different programs for different tastes, and motoring programs make up a very small part of the BBC's content. There's nothing wrong with enjoying cars out of our price range, other people like to watch travel programs, art programs, fashion programs, all showing things that viewers may not be able to afford.

As for the environmental aspect, we have free speech, and many other programs encourage travel, consumerism and wastefulness to a greater degree.

So the male humour is not to your taste, but it is to many other people which is why Top Gear is so popular, even with people not that interested in cars. I assume you did not see the recent Top Gear Ground Force special for sport relief. I, and many other, considered it one of the funniest things on television for a long time.

I, along with millions of other viewers (around the world), are eagerly awaiting the new season...

Those who don't get Top Gear never will.

I don't lilke Football so I don't watch it, but others do and I respect that.

TOTALLY AGREE!!!!

I'm just waiting for the episode where Clarkson crashes - I'll have popcorn for that one!

Top Gear is like a relic that should have stayed undiscovered. It’s a show for the rich or deluded, that now serves no purpose in relation to informative television. And we the people are footing the bill for a show that is so out of touch for the ordinary man. It’s ideal for the breeding of the hooded wearing louts that aspire to be nothing of value in society; Other than to be a strain on modern society, with their vibrating stereos on wheels. How ironic that Jeremy Clarkson was involved in an altercation last year by the very people this show appeals to. The presenting is so appalling, and worst of all predictable. The presenters must be thinking how on earth they are continually being paid by the Beeb and spawning rubbish shows with the same tired predictable presenting style which is Hammond and May trying to be Clarkson light and not being able to characters in their own right. Over the top sensationalism and laughing at they only jokes how sad. The Top Gear specials are an insult to us all. The time money and people power must be immense. Ridiculous, whimsical races that have no relativity or believability; edited to an inch of a every pixel, made to make us believe that there is any drama involved at all, pitiful. The BBC’s standards have certainly dropped. It’s not without consequence either the great unwashed are paying for this in more ways than you’d think.

Funny really, someone exercises their right to free speech and gets blasted for it! That's the problem with these modern "bloggs" people always disagree with your opinion and sometimes get quite personal.I must admit, I don't mind Topgear, but I never go out of my way to watch it. What you said about dangerous driving and carbon foot prints could'nt be more true, some people seem to treat topgear like its the Holy Bible! People moan at you for expressing your opinion, at the end of the day you are a critic? Thats the whole point of being a critic. And by the way, have you tried 5th gear? ;-)

I agree with the past few comments and would extend it further. They have addressed some of what is sometimes described as Lowest Common Denominator TV. I would also call your attention to the other end of the spectrum - that sort of TV programme which seems to pitch itself at the hyper-intelligentsia, whether it be about "Art" or "History" (one person's interpretation, anyway), "Music" or "Architecture". What are we actually talking about here? Minority programs, or what you might call anti-Minority programs, which appeal to a non-minority of the watching public yet still not everyone who is watching. The great thing about the TV is that it has a switch to change channels, and it has a switch to switch it off. With Freeview, Freesat and the like, there's usually something to interest me, and if there isn't then I can watch a film or a program I recorded. I might well rail at my family about wanting to watch Strictly Ice Ballroom or Rhinoplasty, Rhinoplasty, Rhinoplasty or Bone Idol, but as Voltaire said, I would die for their right to be allowed to make that choice. Well, maybe not die - it's only TV, after all...

i love topgear

i love the stig

i love jeremy

simon doesnt understand comedy

I Hate The Stig!

Apart From That I Like Top Gear!

I Hate The Stig!

Apart From That, I Like Top Gear!

Brilliant article! I agree with every word. Top Gear is just like a children's programme. Rod, Jane and Freddie for over-age saddos. Clarkson is the very epitome of naffness. I've often wondered why Motoring Presenters have to be so small-minded. Aren't there any intelligent ones? Why must they all talk in that simple childish sing-song way with predictable pauses and use such a limited set of cliches? Still, Clarkson is very popular with a certain type of person - but so were Jeffrey Archer, Paul Daniels, and Chris De Burgh.

Why is there shows about cooking? Why is there shows about nature?

The same reason why Top Gear is on. You are talking from a minority view here because all these shows on are to entertain people interested in these topics. Isn't the BBCs point for providing the public with programmes to "inform, expain and entertain"? The BBC are certainly doing this, I am not interesting in cookery programmes at all as I cannot cook but I appreciate them being on there, I just choose not to watch it.

If you dont like it - DONT WATCH IT.

I personaly love top gear i find it amusing and great. it is not supposed to be a show where they drive 1million mph supercars because they have "a star in a resonably priced car" resonably priced! not star in a 500grand car. they also say that they like cheap and clever cars such as the Toyota Igo. The fact you mention Jeremy Clarckson's high opinion of himself is ludercrus because it is funny listening to him rattle on about "when he comes to power". I personally love there challenges because again there supposed to be funny and they try to give a top gear top tip which at sometimes admittably is useless but none the less funny. not everyone likes the same shows and you shouldn't say bad things about that person because they do My personal opinion is that top gear is great and next time pick a show that isn't the highest rated to bad mouth.

I love the show. I drive a Nissan CUBE that Clarkson actually slated but it didn't change my opinion. It was interesting to know his take on it despite that. I think the show's at its best right now. I used to watch many years ago and started switching off when Tiff and his pals just raced everything around and stopped featuring cars we'd drive every day. I started to watch again when Jeremy, Richard and James took over and I've never been disappointed. They have me howling at times and there's not much on TV these days that does that. I'll even sit and watch the repeats at times and still have a laugh. I love cars but don't switch on JUST for that. I switch on to be entertained. I'd be intrigued to know what the chap who started this blog finds amusing and what gives him a titter if Top Gear doesn't !! :-p

Simon your a stereotypical accountant you need to loosen up it's a laugh not a documentary. Stop complaining and use your time to do something worthwhile like have a go at Big Brother, The Jeremy Kyle Show etc... Ok Clarkson can be big headed and self-righteous, of course climate change is happening. But Hammond and May are alright and you couldn't do a better job of it than any of them, even if you tried. Topgear's at least a good bit of entertainment that doesn't make the British people look like idiots unlike BB, East Enders, Cory ...

I have very little interest in cars. Like you I believe, it goes thats enough.

But I love Top Gear. I dont care that I'll never be able to afford the cars, I dont care that they dont tell me the most there is to know about engineering. I watch it because it's a bit of a laugh.

Your criticism of Jeremy Clarkson is fair enough, but what you failed to mention was that he is also funny and entertaining.

Surely not a relation of newsreader John Humphreys (a big fan of top gear as shown in the Peel P50 segment in the last series) because if you were I am sure he'd b**ch slap you in submission and if he is a relation I will gladly hold his coat whilst he did so.

I drive a ten year old 1 litre Nissan Micra, the automotive equivalent of pot noodle, I couldn't care less about fast expensive cars as they just seem to me to be a way of advertising how much money you have by owning a totally impractical car. Certainly on our congested and under maintained road system nobody's going to be able to go very fast for very long in them.

I still like top gear though, it is fun and entertaining, Jeremy Clarkson, James May and Richard Hammond have an excellent chemistry and cameraderie and they are very funny.

Sure Jeremy Clarkson acts acts like an unreconstructed eighties thatcherite - a persona he adopts with ease and irony - spouting colonel blimp-isms with a twinkle in his eye as if daring you to have a go at him. He's opinionated, impatient and argumentative, but he's not boring, joyless or humourless.

More to the point, he rather enjoys scandalising the righteous and PC - witness the controversy when they lit pipes up on stage - the screaming from the anti smoking lobby and the likes of Harriet Harmon was a joy to listen to.

James May is parodying himself as the British tinkerer, the man who fiddles about with engine parts in a shed, possibly while smoking a pipe and wearing slippers.

Richard Hammond is the would be fashion icon (in his dreams perhaps) and perennial naughty schoolboy.

They are all exaggerating parts of their characters for entertainment value - and occasionally putting themselves at some risk to entertain us.

No-one should really believe that what you see on the screen is all there is to these men and you'd be a fool if you did.

This show is about fun and entertainment, it is a million miles away from a serious and sober discussion about which is the best mid-price family saloon to buy and thank goodness for it.

"I like the programme and it's about 'fun' and 'having a laugh'. Perhaps Simon Humphreys cannot comprehend such a notion?" No, maybe Simon Humphreys just doesn't find Clarkson and Richard 'can you say midlife crisis' Hammond very funny. I certainly don't. And since every show is exactly the same, surely any humour or fun that was once there dried up long ago. I agree with Humphreys. My perception of this show is a bunch of self congratulating old men droning about a subject that I find intensely boring. It never changes, and it never fails to annoy me.

I never write in to anything like this, but having mistakenly clicked on the article I was interested to see how excited people are about Simon's article. I must admit I do not know many people with Simon's attitude to Top Gear as I am a 45 y/o male from Essex and the majority of blokes I know would agree with me in saying we like Top Gear a lot. It's one of those programs that incite opinion. I think this is the key to the show, that there are opinions. Proper one sided bugger what the large car companies and high brow journalists think opinions, even between themselves ( although slightly contrived) there are huge differences of opinions. This incites debate, surely this is good? Personally I think Jezza plays devils advocate a lot of the time just to ensure there is this sort of debate, it keeps him and the show in the viewing figures they have become accustom to. I also think that the latter series are more contrived than earlier. But I do not know of another program (even on the Beeb) where My wife my three kids 16, 14 & 9 G, B B. Will all sit down and enjoy. My 9 y/o will even hunt it down on cable for re-runs. It's good fun. BTW I like the way that when i used the spellchk supplied by this web site it didn't recognise the place Essex, gave me the option to change to Wessex or Sussex.

I like the programme and it's about 'fun' and 'having a laugh'. Perhaps Simon Humphreys cannot comprehend such a notion?

Whilst I entirely disagree with the sentiment of this piece, it is not the content which I find so disagreeable. It is rather more the arrogant and frankly disdainful tone. As a television critic I suppose Simon's vocation is in fact to tell all and sundry what his opinions are on television programs. Yet what he has done here is embark upon a rant directed at anyone with the temerity to watch Top Gear. His sniping and irksome language beguiles me more than the thought that big brother will be back for endless new series, or even that at some point in the next 24 hours I will be force fed a headline featuring Britney Spears or Amy Winehouse.

Far be it for me to embark upon a personal attack, but it seems the entire purpose of this article is to do just that upon Jeremy Clarkson and indeed anyone that views the show. And so, responding in kind, I find this to be the controversy courting, useless and vapid commentary of a bitter and frankly boring journalist who has entirely missed the point of the program about which he is writing. It is light entertainment, not a submission for the Turner prize.

The real wonder of Top Gear is how three unreconstructed schoolboys have persuaded the BBC to let them indulge their puerile fantasies for so long. This is nothing more than playground humour, riddled with clichés and pointless hyperbole, delivered in a grating, facetious drone.

If we ignore the negitivity that you spin on this comment, you can see just why Top Gear is liked so much. It is about light entertainment, watching something where three people can do something they obviously enjoy. If it is such a bad show, with such mindless, deluded viewers, why then, were the ratings so high in comparison to Big Brother, another popular show of this generation? Top Gear has been going for years and has generated both good and bad press over time, as well as appealling to a wide audience and providing what they want and yet still pulls in viewing figures and popularity.

Obviously, you would happily sit and watch something else. I respect that, but if you hate something so much, why even bother to take the time to write about it? Perhaps, like those sad, mindless people, who are turned on by cars, as you stated, you are in fact, turned on by the controversy you've tried to create here. I'm afraid all you've done is made yourself out to be a humorless, sad person, who perhaps needs to invest in a sense of humor, other than an opinion.

The explanation of Simon Humphreys' hatred of top gear is one of simplicity and is this: Simon Humphreys does not like 'fun'.

I wonder when he last actually enjoyed a good bit of old fashioned 'fun', with laughter and all that stuff.

Top gear is a fun show, with beautiful cars that simply can't be complained about, (if you want to hear mediocre statistics about day to day, average cars, go to a ford dealership)and three boyish, immature, fun-loving, and truly english presenters. And thats why pretty much everyone who has a TV will watch it if it's on.

hi. im a 16year old boy who has a moderate interest in cars and has already decided on a 900cc rover for his first car.

I completly agree with simon (i can write alot) humphreys. I really do.

and it is for all the reasons that simon hates top gear. that we bloody love it.

:-)

Simon's comments are frankly ridiculous - firstly he sounds to be a frustrated journalist who is jealous of the success of Clarkson et al., hence the attack on him.

Top Gear is in NO WAY a show that informs about cars of the type that most of us real-world drivers will have. That's not the point - there are other shows for that, and they are as dull as ditchwater. Top Gear is about entertainment. And that it does very well. Why have the BBC "indulged" this? Because it's one of their highest-viewed programmes, that's why.

Yes, the cars featured on it are irrelevant for 99.9% of the viewers. So what? I have forgotten more about cars than most people know, and I'll never be rich enough to own anything other than a 10-year old shed. I'd still like to know about things that I'll never experience first-hand, in the same way I'm happy that Suzi Perry exists.

Car pornography? Sounds to me like Simon is ashamed of himself, and therefore thinks anyone else who is "sad and mindless" enough to have an interest in a subject he doesn't like is beneath contempt. Fortunately that's not the case. Car bores are boring, yes. But that's not the case with TG.

Promotes Dangerous Driving? How does it do that? All of the "cocking about" is done on their test track. I see far worse driving every day of the week, from people who take no interest in their car, driving ability or the outside world. Most people who are genuinely interested in cars take a pride in their driving, and understanding concepts like understeer and oversteer makes you a safer driver on the roads, not a more dangerous one.

What is wrong with competition? The Star in a Reasonably Priced Car is a fun test of people's driving abilities. Having taken part in many car races, I would defy anyone to do so and not enjoy themselves. It's fun, and a good test of your abilities to see if you can go faster. Why would people like Gambon and Mirren do it? Probably because they have a sense of fun and are also competitive and perfectionists as well.

As for "Ecology", before you make any more ill-informed comments like that, take yourself on a trip to Africa, India, China or anywhere else in the developing world, and take a deep breath of air near any road. THERE you'll see true damage being done to the environment and planet, with cars running unleaded fuel in a terrible state of disrepair, pollution on a massive scale. The cars that TG tests are nearly immaculately clean in comparison.

Surely we can not all like nor dislike the same things, if we did, we wouldn't need choice. Isn't the joy of individuality that we can make a choice as to what we do, what we like and what we dislike? However, if I dislike something, I don't try and convince everyone else that I am right. This single minded viewpoint is the thing that contributes to the political and religious factions, their belief that they are right and that all must follow their views. I'm sorry, we are all individuals, and most of us are adult enough to understand that we sometimes like things that others don't. I'm glad Simon has a view and that he feels he can share it with us, however sometimes that viewpoint must be tempered with the fact that we may not be in the majority. As for me, keep up the good word of the automobile, long may our Sunday entertainment live on. PS, I bet Simon drives a Micra.

I think that Simon is spot-on in his assessment of the show.

My particular objection to Clarkson is that IMO he is a highly intelligent guy who plays at being the Daily Mail's pinup ("it's political correctness gone mad") just because he can and because gets paid a shedload of money for it - not out of any particular conviction.

And for all those that have pointed out the function of the Off button on the remote (and complained that Simon is spoiling their viewing fun) - this is a forum where you talk about TV programmes isn't it???

If you can't have a whinge about your pet peeve here, then where can you? Doesn't mean you have to agree with it, but do try and come up with arguments a bit better than "well my 8 year old and I like it and if you don't then why don't you go back to Newsnight".

And thats why Top Gear is so popular!

Its far Better than old Top Gear that was far more informative and generally..boring, watching Tiff Needell drive around some mountain for the 10th time that month (intrestingly he now presents a show similar to it on C5)

Simon, if you feel this strongly about Top Gear, God only knows how you feel about Big Brother and other so called 'reality tv' shows. Top Gear may seem daft, but when I switch the telly on I like to be entertained, and Top Gear does that, and then some, and when you strip away the laddish humour, your informed as well.

So long may top gear continue - imho.

Hey Simon - here's an idea! If you don't like it, DON'T WATCH IT!! And certainly don't be a self-important imbecile and assume that the rest of the UK (and the world) feels the same as you. The viewing figures speak for themselves (most watched show on BBC2, 2nd most watched BBC series worldwide, most downloaded British show on the internet!). You may be one of those "a car just gets me from A to B" people, but for the several million people in this country who aren't, this show is the best thing on TV - in fact it's the only TV show I actually watch! Also, are you aware that almost 50% of the viewing audience is female? My sister and her husband watch this show religiously, despite having no interest in cars whatsoever. Why? Because it's FUNNY! Why oh why does everyone feel they can't find something funny because it doesn't fit in with their ideals? Humour is simply something that makes you laugh, however purile, immature or stupid it may be. Simon, I'm afraid you find yourself in a minority here, so while you're at it, why not attack Match of the Day and try to get football banned!

EDIT: I should have read some of the other posts here first! Seems I'm not alone... I will NEVER understand why some people have such an over-inflated sense of self-importance that they feel they simply MUST attack a TV show that they hate, and therefore spoil the enjoyment of others. Top Gear has been on the BBC since the 70's and in it's current form for 10 series - it simply has to be popular to have survived that long. Can anyone think of 5 other shows that have lasted that long? I have a serious dislike of at least 90% of the shows on TV, but I understand that they appeal to other people, so I wouldn't try to attack them in a public forum, but maybe that's because I DON'T confuse my opinion with fact.

"I'm surprised about all your whinging and smarmy little attacks on Simon - there's no need to get personal. "I'm sorry? He called us all sad and mindless and you say we're whinging and smarmy? It's one thing to hate a programme, it's quite another to insult it's entire audience. He should go back to watching Newsnight Review, a programme which makes even the people I like look like arrogant, pretensious, unpleasentness. I don't hate them though, I can tell the difference. Kermode for e.g. funny on the radio, not so on Newsnight...

Well, I completely agree with Simon Humphries. I think he's well and truly hit the nail on Clarkson's long head.

I'm surprised about all your whinging and smarmy little attacks on Simon - there's no need to get personal.

While many of you agree, I'm afraid I'm one of those few people who see through Top Gear's facade and that it's toff nosed piece of over-funded garbage. Their banter is painfully rehearsed, the direction ludicrously self-congratulatory.

I enjoyed reading Simon's blog, it reminded that Top Gear isn't a man's programme - but a show for tosspots.

"Frankly, I would rather poke needles in my eyes than ever have to watch it again. "

I have some here waiting....

Hmmm... Now I seem to remember leaving a comment in defence of Top Gear. Some APE must have deleted it overnight.

Top Gear is more intelligent and stimulating than you care to think. It must be one of my favourite TV programs and I don't even care that much about cars.

Richard Hammond has nice hair. (now leave my post alone)

OK, expressing your opinion is fine, but there comes a point when an opinion becomes an insult, and I think you've reached it. I mean, of course you can have your own opinion of Top Gear, but please try to express it nicely and think about both sides of the argument next time.Personally, I love Top Gear. One reason is because of the totally fabulous Mr Hammond, but the main reason is because, like me, you don't have to be interested in cars to watch it and it's a programme with a large target audience (wait, did I mean to write those reasons that way round?). I don't think Top Gear is to blame for dangerous driving. All they do is make fun of cars, and life in general. Anything wrong with that? No.Also, can I remind you that you don't actually have to watch it. If you'll look closely at your remote, you'll probably find an 'off' button, or a switch that might change the channel. Press it, then you can watch the sad sad programmes that you like. Now be a good boy and go stick needles in your eyes.Sapphire xxx

Wow, Mr. Humphreys! You've certainly started something here! So you hate Top Gear and just felt you had to blog about it? Pity you didn't jot it down on the back of an envelope and use the spare room to do your shopping list.

Now listen up. TG is transmitted and watched world-wide. People talk about it the day after it's shown. Usually to say what a fantastic show it was and how they thoroughly enjoyed it. I have an 8 year old great nephew who is a terrific fan and is absolutely devastated that he is not old enough to even be in the audience! And he was most impressed that I've been to a recording.

Just over 2 and a half years ago my father died. In the following months I 'discovered' Top Gear, a show which until then had escaped my notice. I watched it, sat up and took notice. The three 'schoolboys' as you scathingly described Jeremy, James and Richard made me laugh and helped me through my grieving process. I found their antics and the car reviews therapeutic and alternatively laughed and cried whenever I watched.

I doubt very much that any other show would have helped the way Top Gear helped me.

So if you don't like Top Gear, please don't bother watching it and posting your negative comments. I don't like...let's see...Eastenders, Big Brother, Rosemary & Thyme, any costume drama. Football. Rugby. Tennis. Golf. Horse racing. I think Eastenders is all about the cast shouting and screaming at each other. I think Big Brother is like watching paint dry. I think Rosemary & Thyme is twee. I hate football. I hate rugby. I hate....oh, you get the picture? But I can't be bothered to sit at my computer and fire off insulting words at all those involved in the production of these shows. Because somewhere in the country there will be fans. People who would fight tooth and nail to defend their choice of TV watching...their interests, their hobbies.

Top Gear is our interest, our hobby. Our choice of TV watching. It's watched by MILLIONS, worldwide, Mr. Humphreys. It's enjoyed by MILLIONS, worldwide, Mr. Humphreys. It makes the BBC MILLIONS, Mr. Humphreys.

So, I ask you, as my fellow fans have asked you. What do you like to watch, Mr. Humphreys? I look forward to putting up a blog...Why I hate...Mr. Humphreys' favourite TV show.

I am a woman. Mid 30's. I have a car (quite a fast one). It has 6 wheels (including spare tyre & steering wheel). I love driving it. It is black and has a CD player and folding roof. Because of this I really do enjoy Top Gear. Not only for the gorgeous presenters (yes, I did say gorgeous, each in their own special way) They are a perfect mix of everything women like about men. Whether you like 'em small and huggable, testoterone filled and Alpha male (Vicki- you know what I mean!) or would love to calculate the drag factor on the undercarriage of a Caparo T1 with the other, the show cannot help but make you smile. Regardless of the fact you can probably not afford even the keyring from the Lambo in the studio or not, Top Gear brings the general public closer to some cars than they would ever get at an exhibition. By the presenters testing them, passionately talking about them and then larking about in them, you feel 8 years old again and its a real buzz. The one liners are side splitting at times and the production team should get a medal. There are loads of programmes I do not like, but as said here, we do not rant about them, we have lives, we get on with them. Anyone who doesn't like Top Gear should extend their index finger and press that little button on their remote control; you know, the 'OFF' button!

Funny.........i would say some of the same things about shows like Big Brother/Pop Idol/X Factor etc etc! I have no interest in programmes like this so i don't watch them, simple as that!! I love cars full stop, they interest me, i have one, i love it, Top Gear is about cars, so i love that, hence why i watch it. Everybody is entitled to an opinon, but why take the time to watch a programme you don't like, then take the time to complain about it?!?! I don't like Big Bro etc etc, so i don't watch them.....but you don't see me ranting on about them do you?!?! Go figure!!

It's entertainment! If you want informative reviews and real life road tests etc.etc. then read the Top Gear Magazine.I hate cookery programs and the latest Horizon about sensory depravation, better served by watching Big Brother but you don't see me wasting a hour of my life bleating about it. If you don't like it, don't watch it, 8million others do thanks!

WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP GEAR IS A FABULOUS SHOW!!!!! IF YOU HATE SOMETHING SO MUCH WHY ARE YOU WRITING ABOUT IT AND WASTING YOUR ENERGY, LEAVE IT ALONE!!!!!!!!!!! and why do you watch Top Gear if you hate it so much, what is going on????Just get on with your life, i dont understand why people do this, dont you have anything better to do?????? MY GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! TOP GEAR RULES!!!!!!!!!!

I am a woman, I don't own a car or have a driving licence but I still want to know more about cars, than they have four wheels. Top Gear is not mindless rubbish, it is both entertaining & informative. As for being a show for blokes, well I disagree & so do the large number of female fans. I certainly would rather watch endless repeats of Top Gear on "bloke TV" that