Radio Times

Nigella Lawson's latest series sees the "domestic goddess" throwing together haute cuisine in minutes, while juggling a busy work-life schedule and incessantly eyeing up the camera. It's a five-course recipe for annoyance - starting with the infuriating way she talks…

Nigella does nothing so mundane as "putting" her cooking ingredients into a bowl. No, she tumbles in chicken thighs and strews crumble mix (after digesting one of her sumptuous meals, no doubt she expels "gusts" of wind). Maybe it's a disease of TV chefs, but like Jamie Oliver's mockney spluttering and Gordon Ramsay's contrived expletive-scattering, Nigella's increasingly jarring use of "sensual" language is turning her into a self-parody.

Even more offensive than her pretentious vocabulary is Nigella's spurious assertion that she's just like you or me. Yes, we too have to go to the supermarket - but we can't all afford to bring the shopping back in a black cab. Yes, we also must work - but if work meant being filmed while doing all the cooking and shopping we currently (fail to) fit in around our jobs, then work wouldn't be so bad, would it?

And are we really supposed to believe that Nigella rustles up those intricate, elegant dishes in just a few minutes? Well, yes, that's the whole point of the programme - but if, like me, you struggle some evenings to summon up the energy to pierce holes in the film lid of a microwave meal, then I think doing steak with a marinade of crushed garlic, thyme and lemon zest, followed by Eton mess is pretty unlikely - even if you have taken the shockingly plebeian step of using shop-bought meringues.

Here's another thing - we don't all have a grocery budget bolstered by the spoils of book deals and television shows. It's a lovely idea treating a group of friends to 100 grams each of fresh crab meat for lunch, but at seven quid a time I'd have to spend a day dangling fishing line off Brighton pier, and that certainly wouldn't speed things up.

Now I realise that for some people Nigella Express is aspirational TV, and that they really do want to see her lunching with "the girls" or throwing together a perfect last-minute soiree for friends. But when she starts - in that smug, faux-irreverent way - to refer to these showbiz mates as "those reprobates", then, really, don't you just want to slap her?

You guys are awful! Nigella is awesome and those that look down on her, SHAME ON YOU! What have you accomplished in your meger lives? we are all people and all have our on reason for doing things and way to live, have respect. Don't judge what you don't know!

Nigella may be pretentious, but when she sucks some sticky ingredient from her finger, I can forgive her anything.

Just tie your hair back, Nigella. And get your ... out of the soup.

i've only just found this site; I'd hoped to find a place where there could be a really thoughtful discussion of the intrusion of 'MUSIC' plastered over everything in radio and TV - especially wrecking all the superbly photographed TV documentaries so that no doubt there is now a whole generation which expects to always view the countryside to the accompaniment of synthetic soaring strings; also so that most trailers cannot be heard for the 'background' orchestral noises; and finally because the 'music' rapidly sends me to sleep, so that i miss most of the programmes anyway; lets hear from those who commission and provide this dreadful audio pollution- will someone in RD set up a blog for this?

i've always thought that this youngish woman has an unhealthy LARDY look about her - i cannot pin down exactly what this look reminds me of, but it is exceedingly off-putting!

I'd certainly never advise Nigella Lawson in relation to her cookery skills but please, please get rid of her television director. I want to watch a cookery programme, not a very bad attempt to win the Cannes Film Festival. The "now you see it, now you don't" editing of pans of foods and kitchen utensils. I know what an electric pepper grinder does and what it looks like. I want to see how the food is prepared and cooked not a close up ground pepper falling into a pan. The eternal out of focus shots! What are they all about? It's a cookery programme not an optician advert. Also get rid of that irritating incessant music that doesn't add anything to the show, shades of Rachel Allen (is it the same director?). What should be a very good programme is totally spoilt by these unnecessary additions.

whatever her pretentions I think she's a wonderful woman - having seen the tv docu of her late husband's struggle with throat cancer and how supportive she was of him she can do no wrong in my eyes. She is filthy rich and I can't relate to her lifestyle - she's got a freezer bigger than my backbedroom - but she's no snob - she drinks from a bottle for God's sake!!!

I hate lots of people, quite specifically Gary Rhodes showing off his smug-git designer eveningwear but performing like a carthorse at Ascot in the current Strictly Cum Dancing. Now how do I get my own RT blog?

It's just so irritating. The fact she shops at waitrose for a start, then gets in a cab and then proceeds to use a variety of disposable foil trays, sandwich bags etc. Apart from the cost of these things, what about the environment? I'd rather spend a minute washing up my baking tray than contributing to an already massive waste disposal problem. I still watch it though, even it's just to laugh at her ridiculous use of sensual words to describe the food! Oh, and one last thing why does she insist on wearing that shapeless denim jacket on every program???

Phew, I feel better now after my rant!!

ain't you guys heard of Iceland?? all cooked for you, just heat it up! seriously though watch all the cookery progs and love them! nigella,jamie,gordon your always find something you want to try!

Watch Rachel Allen. Easier recipes and more pleasing to the eye.

I've always thought that she should come with a health warning on the lines of 'Cook and eat just like me and you will look all lardy just like me'...; I'm amazed that her unhealthy flabby pale look is considered by so many to be sexy

quote from string originator - "but if, like me, you struggle some evenings to summon up the energy to pierce holes in the film lid of a microwave meal...". Wow. This is sad...

I have to say that, like her or not, the recipe book which accompanies the series is WONDERFUL. I have become pretty addicted to leafing through the book and picking out a new recipe to try:- it's akin to Nigel Slater's style of using very few ingredients, but keeping them high-quality so that the food tastes great.

I understand the comments made by other people here but I was never a fan before and now her recipes have convinced me that she's a culinary inspiration. We don't watch bland, boring people on TV: everybody is a caricature of their personality on the box, so why expect a TV cook to be any different? (And, let's face it, if Paul Jones's blog wasn't extreme in its views, it wouldn't have engendered as many strong feelings and comment as it has. Blandness has no place in entertainment, whether written or on the screen.)

I have lived the cliched Nigella dream of coming home from work, cooking with the kids and then cooking again for guests - all using her book. It works for me, even if it doesn't press the right buttons for other viewers.

Oh thank goodness its not just me!!! I was compared to Nigella recently - meant as a compliment - and the poor chap didn't realise that the can was open and worms were wriggling EVERYWHERE.

"GASTROPORN!" I hissed. "The poor woman's only licking her fingers," he countered. "Nonsense," I said, "she's promoting oral sex in the kitchen!"

In all probability he doesn't care about the location of said pleasures, but this week's "softly whipped cream draped over my golden mounds" is beyond bearing (ahem).

Get rid of this woman, all she does is cack-handed assembly projects: there's nothing "express" about preparing 2 days in advance.

If I watch more than 2 minutes of this over paid, under talented cult of celebrity nonsense, I find myself thinking "Come the revolution ...".

If you really want simple tasty cooking with no measuring, and a bit of risk thrown in you can't beat Keith Floyd.

See? I'm not biased against posh people. Only posh people who think we should emulate their vacuous, contradictory, parasitic lifestyles.

Toot toot!

The comments so far seem to have centred on Nigella's style of presenting, but that's not the reason I have become disenchanted with her present series.

I have previously been a fan of Nigella - the producers market the programme all very much as a lifestyle thing - where we are obviously meant to drool over her lifestyle, her house, the lady herself etc as well as the food.

I think those that say she is becoming a parody of herself are somewhat true (although it's never really bothered me all this bossy 'You absolutely MUST use fresh prawns - don't even THINK about frozen ones!') It's all just part of the package. You either like the style, or ignore it.

However, I've given up watching this series since episode 5. Not because of how she talks - no - it's because of the food she prepares.

Every week she presents recipes that are groaning with pounds of sugar and pints of double cream, bucket loads of red meat, handfuls of salt and full-fat everything - and hardly ever a vegetable in sight (you obviously are supposed to have the rest of your 5 portions of fruit and veg at other meals during the day because there is nary a one to be seen at dinner!).

Earlier programmes had a mix of sensible balanced meals and the odd indulgent treat. However, this series has tipped the balance too far into the indulgent. In the first 5 episodes I watched (before I gave up in disgust) there was so much fat, salt, sugar etc - that to be honest, with such nutritionally unbalanced meals you'd be better to buy a ready-made one from the supermarket! Believe me, as a nutritionist, what she's cooking isn't any better for you!

This indulgent diet is probably why the lady herself seems have to put on 3 stones in weight since the last series I watched and has now moved beyond 'curvy' into definite 'pudgy-dom'.

Sorry Nigella - thanks, but no thanks - I don't aspire to such an unhealthy lifestyle!

I thought that I was in the minority until I read the comments on Nigella's latest culinary contribution to BBC2. My boyfriend and I find ourselves losing patience with her condescending attitude and have to turn-off for our own sanity. We too love cookery programmes but find this unbearable to watch. Please BBC, no more "Nigella Express".

I rarely watch this programme now, though I might buy the book when it's inevitably reduced as all cookery books are. I like reading Nigella very much, I think she's a good food writer and a couple of dishes from her "How to Cook" book are in my classic standby rep. Indeed, one is so simple and easy to make it's probably been featured in this series and it really is quick and delicious to prep, cook and clean up. (one pan cooking, how I love it). But written language is more formal and mannered than spoken language and what reads well doesn't always sound so good. Spoken language is generally more casual than written language and a straight translation can sound as affected as mockney Jamie.

But what makes the programme ridiculous for me is the cameraman's obession with her lovely bosom which is as irritating as her constant flirtation with the camera. It's good to see older women confident in their sexuality, so often it is simply disallowed because older women aren't 'allowed' to be sexual but I do wonder where Roni Ancona has left to explore with her "Dead Ringers" parody. Perhaps this is Nigella's plan: be a self-parody and use the comedian's material before they get the opportunity?

And one last thing. Really, do Nigella's family and friends really all eat like pigs, stuffing the food into their mouths as if they've never seen food before in their enthusiasm to show how wonderful it all is? And for a late night snack do you really sneak down to the fridge and wrap a lamb chop in parma ham to stuff down your neck before you've even shut the fridge door? Must enjoyment of food translate to ramming it in your mouth as quickly as you can?

It's just all to chi chi for words.

Hi AEStJohn

I agree, using language descriptively and playfully is necessary and generally to be commended. Cooking and eating are incredible sensual things, and it’s completely reasonable to lavish lots of delicious adjectives on them. So when a chef talks about the beautiful vivid colours of a fresh vegetable, or calls a sauce velvety, to me that’s great – the smell, taste and texture of the food is what makes it. What makes Nigella pretentious is her self-conscious use of flowery language to talk about the mundane mechanics of preparation, rather than the food itself. The fact that a chicken thigh is “succulent” is completely relevant but whether we “tumble” it into a bowl rather than just chucking it in seems to me less so. On the other hand, a word like drizzle, which has now passed into common usage, and describes the way you pour oil over a salad better than most, is, I reckon, fair enough. Hmmm… so maybe Nigella is pushing the boundaries, and one day we’ll all be tumbling our chicken thighs… Crab: yes, I seem to be a bit obsessed with it, don’t I? I recently had a go at dressing my own crab and found it loads of fun, and fresh crab really is delicious. I don’t know, but I suspect Nigella and I have something in common in that we wouldn’t give guests the watery, tissue paper-textured tinned stuff, which I’m sure must be what you’re talking about at £3 a time. Fresh white crab meat really is about £70 per kilogram.

God, I’m making myself hungry …

Paul

I have stopped watching Nigella altogether as I can't abide her smug attitude and would rather use the other cookery books available off the shelf and not necessarily by any celebrity cook! Who is the lucky student living off £50 a week! Bet you can rustle up super meals on such a whopping budget!

I quite like her style. It's fun and friendly. OK, so she's posh and flirty, but the recipes are nice and simple. None of this measuring business, just a cup of this or a dash of that. And for me, a nice easy episode watching Nigella cook before stuffing it all in her face (every episode she has seconds! haha!), rather than an irritating, common pug with a speech impediment using words I've never heard of ("Pukka"????), or a grumpy git who has a two word vocabulary that can only be broadcast after the watershed.

Furthermore, it's all about practice. To use your mathematical equation,

x(prep + cooking + eating + clearing up) = x(prep + cooking + eating + clearing up)/x to the power of x

...in other words, the more you do it, the faster and less stressful it becomes, regardless of whether you have a dishwasher or not.

And here's another timesaving tip free of charge - providing you rinse the soapsuds off your dishes, if you leave them on the drainer, they will dry themselves! Giving you and hour or so to go and catch up with Nigella's next programme ;)

Completely agree with your comments about the presentation of the show - but that just the package isn't it? As you say, Jamie is the cheeky chappie, Gordon is the Glesga hardman and Nigella is the flirtatious posh totty. It's just brand building...

As for the recipes, they really are quick and easy. I'm no expert cook, but I tried the sliced steak recipe almost as soon as I saw it and it is astonishingly simple as well as very very tender!

We also tried the Mexican fiesta recipes this weekend and the Margarita ice cream just defies credulity - how can something so delicious be so simple to make?

I now watch the show for amusement but I take the recipes very seriously. Can't wait for the next instalment...

Hi All,

Again, I'm not usually one to comment on things like this but the whole debate seemed incredibly one-sided to me. I am a student living on £50 a week and I have used both Nigella's programme and the book to assist me in broadening my culinary horizons!

There are some recipes in there which contain some slightly more extravagant ingredients, for example crab meat, but I live in London and can still find in Tesco's and M&S for less than £3. But the point of some of these recipes is not for everyday fodder, but to provide something simple and delicious to rustle up for a nice occassion, such as a good friend visiting for lunch.

Overall, the book is very positive and has provided me with infinite inspiration. The recipes are swift and simple to prepare. As for washing up, if you are not environmentally conscious, it is perfectly possible to use disposable equipment for very messy dishes and lets face it, most people shove everything in the dishwasher anyway!

All in all, Nigella may not be perfect, but she strives to assist us in being able to prepare delicious dishes very simply and that is an admirable quality. As for taking a black cab back from the supermarket - I usually take public transport but as I don't drive I also have to take black cabs occasionally and I am merely a lowly student!

Personally I find the innuendos hilarious. So much in fact, that I'm tempted to turn Nigella Express into a weekly drinking game: one shot per innuendo. Perfect!

You refer to ‘the infuriating way she talks’ and her ‘increasingly jarring… language’ when the word ‘annoying’ would serve well enough in both sentences. Of course you use the words you did, however, because they more effectively relate a certain sensation and the variety of vocaulary does make your ‘article’ (if I may borrow your arbibtrary use of inverted commas) a slightly better read. It is both hypocritial and needlessly spiteful to rebuke Nigella for her playful and imaginative use of language when you’re quite guilty of it yourself. Similarly, you comdemn Nigella for making the 'spurious assertion' that she is 'like you or me' despite your recurring and determined attempts to convince us that you're some archetypal everyman.

I'm not entirely certain why crabs keep popping up and of course I don't know where you do your shopping, but at Tesco 500 grams of crab meat is less than £3 - about the same as a digestable ready meal for one and more than enough to feed a few guests. Your argument seems to be little more than resent owing to the fact that is she is rich and, ostensibly, clever. The affair may well be a bit contrived but all television is just that - deliberately creative - and only the six o'clock news and reality programmes purport not to be. It may get on one's nerves occaisonally but it is to be expected.

Yeah very smug and annoying,could do without the boy skateboarding round Eaton Square.Notice husband has good sense not to appear on camera!!!!!

Hi Rosalindjane

Thanks for your comments. In my defence, I do cook - in fact I love cooking, and cookery shows - but despite what Nigella might claim, it is hard to manage preparing a proper meal every night.

I just don't believe her recipes are as quick as she claims when you take the preparation into account, and when you consider how you may be feeling after a day at work. It may well work in Nigella's favour that she doesn't do a 9-5 job. It must be great to be able to get to the supermarket during the day when it's nice and empty. Another thing she never seems to touch on is the washing up and cleaning aspect of cooking. I don't know if she does it herself but that certainly adds time to the whole thing. I reckon prep + cooking + eating + clearing up = an entire evening gone, however "Express" the dishes are.

Also, fresh crab really is as expensive as I say. So having four people for lunch is going to cost you £28 before any of the other ingredients. For a casual meal, it's beyond the reach of both a student and, believe me, a Radio Times blogger.

Finally, I fully stand by my comments about her smug self-parody. What is particularly annoying is not that it's a show about how great she is supposed to be, but that she thinks we can't see how heavy-handed it is in contriving to demonstrate this. It's kind of insulting. As for my own smug attitude, well it's time Nigella got a taste of her own medicine. Now if she only had time in her busy schedule to read my blog....

Paul

Hi all, I just wanted to comment. I totally agree that the show is thoroughly annoying. I love cookery programmes but the way Nigella smugly looks at the screen and gives us her coy looks made me turn off I'm afraid! She really got on my nerves, trying to make out she's 'normal'. Yeah right! The supermarket and the taxi cab was the last straw for me and I didn't watch after that... and rosalindjane you were quite rude in your comments to the others about having no cooking talent etc, they didn't say they had no talent in cooking, they were merely commenting that sometimes when you've had a hard day at work, a microwave meal is the only thing you feel like cooking... not that they have that every day! (I hope not anyway lol). Most of their comments were about Nigella's smug attitude - and how annoying it is!

The cooking has become a sideshow, really. I've taken to watching it each week just to check whether she's persisting with this unbearably smug, grotesque parody of herself that she inexplicably started doing this series. It's astonishing. I can barely believe that no-one on the production team put their hands up and said "Hang on, though, won't this really, really annoy people?"

My girlfriend and I have a competition each week to see which one of us cracks first and unleashes a stream of expletives at the screen. I always lose. Just. And man, we usually love cookery shows.

If you saw the one a fortnight back when a "tearful friend" came over for chocolate biscuits, and you managed not to scream in fury, you deserve to be canonised. "You're right, Nigella, he's not worth it - but these chocolate biscuits are," she snivelled. "They are, aren't they!" smiled Nigella. Hooray!

Hi. Normally I don’t comment on blogs but yours is just so full of “MY UNITELIGENT THOUGHTS! LET ME SHOW YOU THEM’ that I actually registered so I could post a comment to you. Now, I like Nigella Lawson. Her Christmas TV show got me into cooking, so we can say I’m biased but I’m not here to rant about how Nigella is the best thing ever – I know other people don’t like her and your are allowed to dislike the smug aura of the show. Yes, it is horribly smug.

However, the recipes aren’t at all hard to cook. My boyfriend brought me the Nigella Express book as a moving in present and we’ve cooked our way through pretty much every thing in there with ease and enjoyment. Perhaps you just have no talent in the kitchen?

And really, it’s not that expensive. Buying good, cheep produce from your local supermarket or butcher and making it up at home is much, much cheaper than a trolley full of microwave meals at £4 a pop. And we live on a students budget so we have even less money than Radio Times blogists.

But what really annoyed me about your little article is how you somehow feel proud about your lack of culinary ability and the fact that you’re stuffing yourself full of additives and e-numbers instead of doing something for yourself.

Really, I wouldn’t have commented at all if it wasn’t for your horribly smug attitude.