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Why I Love...Judge Judy

Judge Judy
  • Posted at 11:22am
  • 31 August 2007
  • by FrancesLass-RT
  • 1 comment

Don't piddle on Judge Judy's feet and tell her it's raining. Because "Stupid" isn't written across her forehead and because, I guarantee you, if you live to be 100, you'll never be as smart as she is today.

These are just some of the ripe put-downs and fabulous Judyisms that she uses to strip away any foolish litigant's attempts at getting one over on her. She’s a tenacious, truth-seeking rottweiler, fixing defendants with a gimlet gaze that would make a hard man feel like a schoolboy, and a cocky schoolboy wish he’d never been born.

Her tactics are simple: first, zero in on the attitude - "unfold your arms", "take your hands out of your pockets", "don't come into court dressed like that" - then, having reduced the victim to a quivering peanut butter and jelly sandwich with some fancy questioning, the liar is winkled out and despatched with a dismissive flourish. She is like an insect that injects its prey with stuff that turns its insides into mush and then sucks it out. And it is an absolute hoot to watch.

Buried in the daytime schedules of ITV2, Judge Judy hands out summary justice to a cross-section of American society, who will sue your ass off for a couple of dollars. Be it being bitten by your neighbour's dog or trying to get that ex to cough up the loan you made when you were still going out ("It was a gift"…"I'll decide if it was a gift or not, not you"), Judy will mesmerise you with her cunning, while you look on flabbergasted at the ludicrous, petty nature of some of these cases.

A veteran of the family-court system, some wily network inviegled the New York judge to come to LaLa land to preside over the small-claims court (top whack $5,000), where everyone from hillbillies to lawyers come to her to sort out their differences. To watch her destroy those Californian princes and princesses with some salty New Yorker common sense is a joy to behold. Like a cross between Solomon and Jeremy Kyle (without the bullying), she is better and less expensive than a trip to the therapist.

And just because it is daytime fare, don't make the mistake of thinking it is for the retired, the unemployed and the sickie thrower. She's been immortalised in an episode of The Simpsons (is there ever higher recognition of iconic status?); in The Parent Rap, Judge Constance Harm is a parody of Judge Judy and orders Bart and Homer to be chained together.

She's even had that lord of the anti-establishment John Lydon up before her and had him purring like a kitten and house-trained within seconds. Lord knows how many dominatrixes have been asked to don legal robes in honour of Her Honour. And she is beloved of students and anyone else who has stumbled over her daily doses of "do I look like I need any help from you?" and "Madam, are you on some sort of medication?" gibes.

So, next time you're home a bit early tune into the Judge. It would be criminal not to.

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  • Posted on 23 September 2007
  • at 3:37pm
  • by nezello

HERE IS THE PROOF JUDGE JUDY IS RIGGED!

http://judgejudyisascam.com/

Or do a Google search for Judge (JOKE) Judy

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