Sunday 08 November

BLOGS

blogCategory
Previous
Back to blog
Next

Why I Love...QVC

QVC logo
  • Posted at 5:16am
  • 15 March 2007
  • by RhodriMarsden-RT

"Now then," continues the presenter, with a broad smile that promises astonishing bargains. "Let's move on to item number 674107, which is the Chronograph Black Dial Stainless Steel Watch. Of course, it's made of steel, and I know it sounds obvious, but it's not going to stain." The trick that the QVC host has to pull off is simply to keep talking.

If that means describing the non-corrosive properties of ferrous alloys, fine. If it means describing a few garments that might show off the watch to its best effect, so be it. If it means recounting an anecdote about the time that their own steely, stain-free watch was running slowly and caused them to miss their best friend's wedding, well, even better.

For 17 hours a day, 365 days a year, QVC presenters give a series of masterclasses in off-the-cuff improvisation. They might not be consistently funny or relentlessly informative, but they manage to keep going without reference to a script, cue cards or scrolling teleprompter. To put their genius into context, consider the long-running BBC Radio 4 show Just a Minute: audiences are bewitched by panellists who attempt to talk for 60 seconds on subjects as vague and rich with possibility as "Annoying Habits".

Over on QVC, the intrepid presenters are extolling the virtues of a pack of ten blank video cassettes for ten whole minutes, without stopping. They never deviate, barely hesitate and only repeat themselves when telling you the item number, price, and number to dial when you "pick up that phone". Forget the cut and thrust of 24-hour news channels or celebrities eating Australian grubs - this is television on the edge.

And it's not just the gab they have the gift of; they're terrifyingly convincing salesmen. If you were wandering up the local high street and someone tried to sell you a bi-directional hacksaw or a leather massaging inversion table with herb-oil dispenser, you'd tell them where to go - and rightly so. But on QVC, somehow the arguments for purchase seem powerfully persuasive.

That inversion table starts to seem like a must-have, even at £1,100 - and particularly when spread over three easy payments. And if I'm buying one item, well, why not save on postage and add a few more items to my QVC shopping basket?

The infrasonic home security scanner - surely £40 is a price worth paying for peace of mind? An opal five-stone eternity ring, allowing me to revel in the rich lustre of gold for £51.12? A set of five patchwork stencils with embossing tool and pricking pen? I mean, who knows what it's for, but at £20.64 plus postage and packing, I'd be crazy not to find out.

So thank you, QVC. You make home security, cheap jewellery and papercraft more entertaining than I could ever have imagined.

Link to this post
Post a comment

Post a comment

Do you have something to say about this post? Share your thoughts…

Post a comment

(first or nickname only)

Please do not include any personal or personally identifiable information about yourself or others (including email addresses). All information you submit about yourself or others can be viewed by others.

Thank you for your comment

Thank you for your comments. All comments will be looked at by a moderator, however, due to the numbers of comments we receive, we can't promise that all will be posted on the site.

Post another comment

More


Advertisement