There will be "seismic" shocks in his weekend's sporting picks...
"The earth will tremble" when Georgia's "monster" Mamuka Godgodze squares up to Argentina in Sunday's Rugby World Cup clash.
And Saturday's early morning game will "mangle your muesli" when England faces Scotland in the much anticipated Pool B match.
Finally, just as you thought the ground would settle, "along comes the footie", with Bolton Wanderers v Chelsea and Spurs v Arsenal...
England v Scotland - Saturday 1 October, 8:00am, ITV1
Argentina v Georgia - Sunday 2 October, 1:00am, ITV1
Bolton Wanderers v Chelsea, Sunday 2 October, 1:00pm, Sky Sports 1
Tottenham Hotspur v Arsenal, Sunday 2 October, 3:30pm, Sky Sports 1